Around Here: Week 47 2025

 {November 16-22nd}

Texts with Grandma Pansy

Welcoming... Josh home after a weekend away with our brother-in-law. It was a rough weekend without him and I won't want him leaving any time soon. 

Parenting... sigh. Parenting. What can I even say that I haven't already said? Parenting teens is harder than I ever imagined. I would go back to infants & sleepless nights & diaper changes in an absolute heartbeat over parenting teenagers. Not that one is necessarily easier... but I knew what I was doing then. I knew when they were crying whether they needed a diaper change or a bottle.  I knew if they were tired and needed a nap. I knew what to do and how to do it. And now, I am rudderless.  I am without a map. I am absolutely making it up as we go. And I have little to no confidence that I'm doing the right thing. Add to that feeling the fact that I'm doing it times two with twins, and it just feels like the risks are doubled. If I mess up with one, it inevitably impacts the other. And as for helping them navigate their brotherhood/friendship/twinship... I am truly clueless there. How much fighting or competition is normal? How much helping and caring for each other is too much? Too codependent? I'm not sure. And all those twin blogs I followed in the early days have fallen to the wayside amid jobs and privacy and raising kids, so I truly feel all alone out here. 

Speaking... of privacy, that's why I have to speak in generalities when it comes to my boys (and sometimes even Carly)... At these older ages, they deserve some space to be kids (or teenagers) and not have it blasted all over the internet. As hard as that is for me (I operate as an open book) I believe in respecting them and their requests. (Please know I have SO many more pictures of the boys than I share on here- they just don't like me to post all of them.)

Researching... snowflakes on Google and reading all about them to Carly. I was riveted.

Doing... some chores on Sunday, but not as gung ho as I normally do.

Making... follow up appointments for Jack with an ENT in Wenatchee and an oral surgeon here in town. Our orthodontists believes Jack would benefit from jaw surgery to help make his windpipe wider.  

Admiring... Carly's winter wonderland made with paper and cutout snowflakes.  She even made teeny tiny snowballs for the toys to use for a snowball fight. Her creativity knows no bounds. 

Gathering... our book club reads from 2019 to 2025, sending possible lists to my book club friends to consult. We are planning on doing a book exchange at the end of December, so I thought having a complete list of books we have read together would help us narrow down our favorites and choose which one to bring for our white elephant book exchange. 

Struggling... to get my four kids to sleep. The way that ADHD impacts sleep is mind boggling. Sometimes the kids struggle to get to sleep.  Other times they struggle to stay asleep. And still other times, they wake up earlier than they should (especially Carly) and can't fall back to sleep. 

Subbing... for two hours one afternoon and feeling glad to spend even that little amount of time in the classroom.

Enjoying... a quick walk outside to try and shake some of the stress off.

Baking... my birthday cake which was a spiced apple cake with caramel frosting. It turned out delicious!

Celebrating... my birthday without Josh, who was at work until 9:00pm that night. I was so bummed that he had to work late, but the kids sang me happy birthday while Wyatt took pictures. Carly made sure to make the day special.  She made me a card and lit my candles for me. 

Feeling... loved when Josh came home with yellow roses, a cinnamon candle, a gift card for Barnes & Noble and the sweetest card after working a 13 hour day. I don't know what I did to deserve him, but I am so grateful he is mine. The cinnamon candle especially got me because he hates the scent of cinnamon, but he knows I love it. Sigh. He's the best.

Reading... a post from my sister for my birthday and feeling beyond touched by her kind and generous words. "When I think of her I think of comfort and laughter and authenticity. She always shows up for her people, and never gives up. To know her is to love her, and BE LOVED by her!!!" Can you even?

Writing... an English paper with Logan, which mainly consisted of me sitting nearby and keeping him on track. It is in these moments that I truly see just how challenging ADHD makes things that were so easy for me. Things I took for granted as a neurotypical person. This was no small paper, either. It was 9 paragraphs and covered some tough topics. But he got it done and we both felt immense relief!

Enjoying... lunch with my friend Crystal (her treat! I'm so spoiled!) and her youngest, Archie. He is quite the charmer with amazing cheeks and smiling eyes. In addition to treating me to lunch, Crystal brought me the biggest Kit Kat bar I have ever seen. She said she wanted to "give me a break"- get it?! Haha!

Touched... that Crystal, while having our lunch together, said that my being sensitive makes me a good mom. That it doesn't make me "too much" or burden my kids as I mentioned, but made me more responsive to their needs and moods. More aware of their perspectives and their feelings. That meant a lot to hear from her. 

Frustrated... that some teachers are less forgiving and less willing to work as a team for my boys with 504's. It's hard because I know they are overworked and underappreciated, so I hate adding more to their plate. However, I am also an absolute mama bear, and I'm gonna go to bat for my kids every time. 

Shopping... with my mom and sister to celebrate my birthday. We had originally planned to paint pottery, but then on the night they came into town, all our pottery places were closed! So we pivoted and spent hours at Marshall's, looking at gift ideas and Christmas decor. We had so much fun, so many laughs, and ended the night with a quick dinner at Wendy's. Time with them is always my favorite, and I swear we would have fun no matter what we did. 

Bribing... one of our boys with riding dirt bikes this weekend if he can go to school. Parenting is just so humbling. Before I had kids I had so many ideas of how I was going to parent, and now it's less decision making and more survival. If bribery works to increase attendance, so be it! 

Taking... a nap. The stress of parenting near-adult teenage children along with a fourteen and nine year old while simultaneously supporting my husband in his new position is doing.me.in. I'm trying not to view rest as a waste... but it's a challenge. 

Subbing... for a new kindergarten class while they teacher recovers from surgery. I was so happy to meet the students and settle into my time with them. They are absolutely adorable, and the teacher runs a wonderful, structured, fun classroom. It made stepping into her shoes a delight. 

Reading... Before The Coffee Gets Cold on my kindle app; The Other Valley on audio; and The Bright Years in a book-in-hand. They're all quite good and captivating. 

Meeting... with Josh's district's insurance guy to make sure we're covered in a way that best meets our needs. We left Carly with the boys for our meeting, and it was really nice to ride in the van in silence on the way out to meet Josh, who works a half hour away.

Creating... our family's Christmas cards, later than ever, and attempting to write our yearly Christmas letter.  I'm trying not to stress about the timeline, but it's hard when it feels like the weeks are hurtling on by!

Melting... at how much Carly loves her dad. If I am hugging Josh, she comes and squeezes herself in between us. When I tease her that he was mine first, she says, "Well he was mine last, which is most recent, so it counts better." Her logic is hilarious and a terrible argument, but I love her heart for it. 

Driving... Logan to hangout with his friends, and then coming home to make pizza and cookies on Saturday night for Wyatt & Carly. 

Loving... Carly's paper on cranberry sauce. Helping her do her "research" (opening the cranberry sauce can, pouring it on the plate, and letting her cut it) was hilarious, and reading about it was even better. She is a hoot!

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