homesick

 The homesickness hit yesterday afternoon like the flu.  I was entirely unsuspecting, playing "summer camp" with the kids, complete with sleeping bags & canoes in the lake when out of nowhere I got this lump in my throat and a desperate need to see my friends, my family, my hometown.

I've been on the verge of tears ever since.  

 It has been over two months since we got here, and the novelty of our family being reunited has worn off.  The house is unpacked, we are settled, and the drudgery of caring for the kids has set in. The below zero weather coupled with said drudgery has made for some long days here with the boys.

 The days when we get outside or go play at the school are invigorating, exciting, fresh.  The days where we are stuck inside due to temperatures in the minus twenties are long, tiresome & depressing.

 Especially since the sun is shining like it's the middle of July lately.  Blue skies & sun glinting off the snow, attempting to lure me outdoors despite the freezing cold risk of frost bite.  We are praying for the weather to warm up (ten degrees or warmer would suffice) in time for Josh's parents to come visit.  (They will be here Friday the 23rd.)

---

I miss my mom's sunny kitchen.  I miss my sister's cushy living room rug.  I miss the handmade honey vanilla ice cream at Ice Cream Renaissance.  I miss parks.  I miss driving in my car, rocking out to Sara Evans.  I miss seeing my friends, having playdates and shopping.

All of a sudden I miss every single thing.

 I'm trying to feel the feelings as they come, 

and that means in the three hours I've been up, 

I've cried about six times.

 

 I think this quote puts it quite succinctly:

 "When you're safe at home you wish you were having an adventure; 

when you're having an adventure you wish you were safe at home." 

-Thornton Wilder