10.06.2020

Around Here: Week 39 2020












I stayed in that castle-like building for my night away!


Jack stepped on this goat head in the garage. Ouch!






When I told Josh it took me 32 minutes to do the dishes,
he sent me confetti on text. He always knows how to make me smile.









Oh little Wyatt!





Enjoying... lunch out with my girlfriend Sunday afternoon.  We spent hours talking, uninterrupted, and I swear I had forgotten what it was to finish a sentence, let alone a conversation! Such a blessing to have a friend I love, and a husband who says, "yes, go!" whenever I ask. 

Hosting... the Seahawk's game for Josh's sisters family.  It was so cute to watch our boys cheer and hold their breath during certain plays.  Carly and their daughter Liesel call each other BFF's (and sometimes BCF- Best Cousins Forever) and their friendship is just the sweetest.  While they were here, Tay and Andrea helped Josh build the trampoline he bought for the kids, and they all enjoyed spending time on it.  I have discovered I am definitely the aunt who says yes to everything. I love those kids and want them to be happy, so if they ask, it's pretty much going to be, "Sure!" Haha!

Starting... week two of school and praying it's better than week one. ...but facing the reality that it is hard and not yet getting easier.

Loving... Josh for choosing to leave for work later so that he can see Carly and say goodbye before he takes off.  For the first few weeks of school, he was leaving before she woke up, and it made her sad to miss him in the mornings, so, without discussing it with me or her, he just started staying longer in the mornings so she could snuggle him and kiss him goodbye. He's the best dad, and I am so grateful he's ours. 

Doing... dishes (for daysss) after getting behind on all my household chores.  Doing school full time with the kids is taking a toll on everything I normally accomplish in a day. (It took me 32 minutes to do the dishes Wednesday. Yes, I timed it!) I am sure it will all settle and get better, but for now, it feels a bit like I'm drowning and someone handed me a Chromebook.

Sending... three of my four kiddos off to the land to play with cousins on Wednesday.  (Josh's sister and her husband are in town with their kids, so I let the boys take one day to play with cousins this week!)  Jack stayed home- he was having a stomach ache.  We thoroughly enjoyed a quiet day together, though, and were glad as he felt better throughout the day. 

Working... hard on Thursday & Friday to catch up on the school the kids missed Wednesday visiting their cousins. The twins and I got our butts handed to us as we attempted the first test of the year.  I don't think the way they were working this week is going to be successful, so we'll be doing things differently starting next week. Instead of the boys working independently on their online science & english units, we will be working together, with me acting as teacher, making sure they understand the concepts before we move on to the next. Fingers crossed that will produce better results. 

Prepping... for family photos Saturday, trying on outfits and shoes and making sure the boys' new clothes all fit. I hate the work that goes into photos, but I love having them... so it must be done!

Grateful... for date night with Josh Friday, where he made us pizza and we watched Ocean's 13 and I tried to forget the feelings of failure I had from my long second week of at-home distance learning. "You can do hard things" is on constant repeat in the back of my mind. 

Capturing... our growing family with the help of my sister (thank you, Roxanne!) and getting excited about ordering this year's Christmas card. We got so many great shots (I shared some above, but kept some for a surprise on the cards come December) and everyone was in really good moods.  Jack asked why we had to do family pictures, and I said that we do it for me.  He laughed, but I was serious. It's one day a year where I choose their clothes, fuss over their hair styles and expect them to do as I say so I can get some good pictures. I was so grateful it all went as I hoped. 

Packing... up and hitting the road after family pictures to join my bestie for a little weekend getaway.  I listened to The Nickel Boys by Colson Whitehead on the drive and was instantly captivated.  (It's a heartbreaking story about a juvenile detention center in the 1960's.  I was riveted.) Once I arrived, we visited with my friends' sister-in-law and enjoyed dinner together. We also talked about the enneagram and Shana inspired me to listen to The Road Back To You. I've since started it, and am loving it so much. I can't wait to hear what he has to say about sixes. 

Practicing... mindfulness as a way of bringing my stress level down throughout the day in hopes I can decrease the number of panic attacks I am having.  I try to breathe in and out whenever I think of it, and am working on just "being". Typically, I am always trying to accomplish something. At. All. Times. So I am trying to just sit. Or just stand. Or just drink my coffee.  Without multi-tasking, and without having any demands placed on my time. It's hard, but I can see a difference in my patience.

I am also working on self love (hence the bathroom selfie above) as I am at the highest number I've ever seen on the scale, and am having trouble separating my value as a human (wife, sister, friend, mother) from my weight. I don't associate other people's weight with their value, so I wish I could understand why it's so closely related in my mind for myself. Like as soon as I pass 165lbs (which I am far, far past at this point) I feel like a useless loser and I feel awful for anyone who has to look at me. It's not good. 
(Advice for self love and mindfulness techniques welcome!)
Reading... What I Carry and loving it. Seriously, I wanted to cancel all other plans and just read that book straight through to the end. I love when a book is like that. You should check out my book review on Instagram to see what it's all about. I feel like this, along with Know My Name, should be require reading for humans. 
And Josh is reading the second Harry Potter book to the boys.  They are LOVING it, and I am wishing I could both put Carly to bed and be listening with them, since I've never read Harry Potter. I am thinking maybe next year I will attempt to read the books myself. We'll see!

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I loved this simple reminder.

And some laughs:
#butseriously


hahahah!
(this is life with Wyatt)

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Around Here: Week 38 2020















Deep cleaning... the house in preparation for our first week of school. We chose the distance learning option in our district because even though in person was offered, our health department recommended against it.  The COVID case numbers here don't support school opening.

Facing... our first day of school with no school pictures and attitude for days.  I told Josh it was like breaking wild horses getting these boys to do school after a summer (and really, more like six months) off.  First day was awful.  Only redeeming thing was that we watched Radioactive (about Marie Curie) and we were all mesmerized.  Her science (and her story) were amazing. 
(Available on Amazon Prime)

Sending... Wyatt & Carly to aunt Julie's Monday afternoon to make spider cupcakes.  They had so much fun, and the twins got some much needed mom time after a rough start to the week. 

Waking up... on day two with the opposite kid acting up with attitude, and taking Carly out to Carol's for her Grandma Preschool.  It was nice to be able to focus only on the boys... but I'll be honest, this technology, the arguing, the requirements, the learning curve, have taken their toll on me. 

Running... with all the boys to Winco for groceries after we dropped Carly off, and feeling grateful for the help.  I'm teaching the twins to help me write our menu out, and it has been life changing!!

Watching... the Mt. St. Helen's documentary on Disney, and engaging in so much discussion with the boys throughout. I was born two years after Mt. St. Helen's erupted, but my older brother was a baby when it happened.  So the boys' grandparents all have stories of how the ash piled up, and you couldn't breathe or see.  It was fun to talk to them about an historical event that happened in our neck of the woods and impacted our people. 

Putting... myself to bed SUPER early Tuesday after feeling like I had been run over.  Managing all these kids and their learning feels like I have taken on a full time job suddenly.  Sleep is necessary.

Settling... into our schedule mid week and waking up early to make Josh's salad for his lunch and have a little quiet time before the kids wake up. I thrive on alone time and if I have to wake up at 5:00am to make that happen, so be it. 

Worrying... a lot when Wyatt woke up gasping and was having some breathing issues.  The smoke (from wildfires across our state) has mostly not effected him, because I have kept him inside with our healthy, filtered air, but Wednesday his asthma was acting up. He seemed all better after a nebulizer treatment, though. Thank goodness. 

Reading... Book 2 of the History of the World out loud to the boys and working some ASL (American sign language) into our daily school routine.  Josh's sister and her husband are Deaf, and Josh and I met in ASL class in high school, so sign language is used around the kids all the time, and I think it's time I taught them a bit more.  This is the perfect opportunity. 
I love the History of the World because it reads like a story and my kids love it.  We finished Book 1 in the spring, and I'm hoping to get through Book 2 before Christmas. 

Running... errands to Walmart and Petco after dropping Carly off at Carol's for another day of Grandma Preschool.  We got more toys for Grady to play with (German Shepherds are HARD on toys!) and some ear mite medicine for Molly. 

Reading... Insignificant Events in the Life of a Cactus with the boys and loving it (!); Gilead by Marilynne Robinson- so good, with so many quotes; and The Magnolia Story, which is a fun read so far. 

Trying... to do our nightly walk, but only making it around the block before realizing the smoke was worse than it looked and not worth it.  It felt like I was breathing through a dryer sheet.  Just tight and terrible.  Hopefully the smoke will clear from all the fires soon and we can all get back outside. 

Watching... Schitt's Creek and feeling two things: Gratitude, for the laughter and lightness it brings during these hard times, and Love, for the way that David makes me feel about supporting others in who they love. Love is love is love.

Sleeping in... on Friday when I woke up feeling panicked and exhausted.  The kids were great and let me sleep in, then we did school at a slower pace and thankfully the boys did great at school. I suffered anxiety all day long, which was miserable, but I looked forward very much to date night and the coming weekend. 

Enjoying... hours to myself when Josh took all the kids to the land on Saturday to play with their cousins. It was a day of much needed peace & quiet, in which I watched Audrey & Daisy. {on Netflix}  Audrey & Daisy is a documentary about teenage rape and its consequences.  It reminded me again of how important the book Know My Name is for everyone to read. Sexual abuse leaves marks that we often don't see, and in this case, it lead to such heartbreak for these girls and their families. 

Attending... the family Halloween party that Josh's mom put together for the grandkids. The kids got to go "trick or treating" down Aunt Julie's hallway, knocking on doors and getting different treats & surprises from each person. They were thrilled to get candy and spend time together, and all the grown ups enjoyed homemade macaroni & cheese (yum!) and brisket made by Josh's dad.

Thankful... for my sister who was my cheerleader this week as I lamented to her about how hard school at home has been.  She's a few weeks ahead of me (her district started sooner than ours) and she promised me it would get easier. 




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