Around Here: Week 31 2024

 {July 28th-August 3rd}

Dropping Wyatt at camp...

The Wyatt I felt like I was dropping off at camp.

This is what that tiny sprout of a hibiscus will be if it blooms!

Dropping... Wyatt off at camp and feeling so excited for him! (While maybe also a little nervous. Hah!) I spent every summer going to camp and I loved it so much. After a mild bunkhouse dilemma (he was placed with strangers instead of either of his cousins or their friends), I left him smiling and playing a card game with Milo, my sister's little boy who is only four months younger than Wyatt. I missed him so freaking much all week. I had no idea I would miss him the way I did. The relief I felt when I found him smiling in pictures that the counselors shared on social media was palpable. And finding him on Saturday when Josh and I drove to pick him up? My heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest. I am so proud of him- for going outside his comfort zone and for making friends and being so brave. As we left camp with his giant duffel and forest green sleeping bag, he was doing special handshakes and man-hugs with all the kids from his cabin. 

Eating... out, just Josh, Wyatt and I, on the drive home from camp. I was surprised and a little saddened to realize that I couldn't think of the last time that Josh and I had spent time with Wyatt, just the three of us. He's delightful company- so thoughtful and funny- and we all really enjoyed our time together. 

Finding... this quote and thinking of Wyatt at camp-

"Now I see the secret of making the best person:

it is to grow in the open air

and to eat and sleep with the earth."

-Walt Whitman

Understanding... after taking Wyatt to camp and then purposely driving away from him that letting go will forever be the hardest part of motherhood for me. Give me sleepless nights and math I don't understand everyday. I can handle it.  But I letting go? Letting my kids grow up and stretch their wings? Feels akin to willingly cutting off my own arm. 

Discussing... deep thoughts with the twins' best friend Ainsley.  Talking about God and religion and death.  I wish so much that faith didn't require so much... faith. Hah. I wish I could just KNOW what is real and true. 

Feeling... defeated upon waking up and realizing that our refrigerator is broken. The freezer was 35 degrees and the fridge was 68 when I laid eyes on it. We are beyond blessed that my parents saved the day and bought us a new one that should be delivered some time next week. So in the mean time, we had to empty our fridge, throwing nearly everything out (wahhhh! all that lost money and food!) and moving what was left to the garage fridge that we normally use for beverages. Using only the garage fridge this week has been the worst (#firstworldproblems)- having to go outside for the ingredients, then running them back to the fridge when you're done. Ugh, it's just so annoying. Not to mention that when we pulled it out for Josh to try and work on (it was impossible- the motherboards on those things are completely overwhelming!) it was SO gross back there. So then I had to do a deep clean- vacuuming and mopping and getting it all clean.

Loving... Carly's creativity this week in making a camping scene with her barbies and their camper in the front yard and making wedding bouquets with the baby's breath she bought at the store to put in a vase in her bedroom. I say it all the time, but she really is so much fun. 

Washing... Long Kitty for Carly, who is her current comfort object.  She and Wyatt have always shifted comfort objects, unlike the twins who had santa bear (Jack) and blanket giraffe (Logan) for as long as they can remember. Unfortunately for me (and Carly. and Long Kitty) Long Kitty sort of exploded her insides all over the washing machine. So I had to clean the washer out, and then I had to stuff her guts back inside and sew her up before putting her in the dryer on gentle.

Grateful... for my husband being the kind of man and father that he is. The twins' friend Ainsley needed some help with his car and together the four of them solved the problem. I was so happy for Ainsley and thankful for Josh. He's the best.

Doing... a random deep dive on Elon Musk (whom I still know very little about) when I heard he had, like, a lot of children. Turns out he has twelve children, and their names get a little more strange as time goes on. Nevada, Griffin, Xavier, Kai, Saxon, Damian, X AI A-12, Azure, Strider, Exa Dark, Techno Mechanicus & the last one we don't know the name. He has two sets of twins and one set of triplets, and he has disowned his transgendered child Xavier who now goes by Vivian. So crazy and sad.

Meeting... my mom's foster puppies which are King Shepherds and just the sweetest little bundles of joy. It's so tempting to think we could get one.  Thankfully we have a small yard so that's keeping me from being crazy. 

Setting... a goal for the month of October to read and go outside everyday.  I was almost instantly grateful for that goal when I stepped outside one night this week to see the most incredible sunset. I couldn't stop taking pictures of it!!!

Reading... Margo's Got Money Trouble which is so completely unexpected but also delightful and entertaining that I am flying through it! So good!

Starting... a new journal which is one of my favorite feelings in the world, right alongside finishing a journal. There's something about all those blank, unfilled pages that feels exciting, and there is something about all those pages filled to the brim with life and joy and sadness that feels like a full life... I just love them both.

Doing... a night swim with Josh & the twins. It was so lovely, the heat of the day slowly dissipating as the sun set completely and the dark took over. 

Breathing... deeply as I deal with my teenagers. Oh man they make me crazy. They can be so dumb (Hello? Frontal lobe? Can we power on, my friend?!) and impulsive... but I love them just as much as they drive me nuts. I think the hard part at this point is that it's no longer just my story that I'm considering, but theirs as well, which means that I am keeping a lot more private than I have in the past. Something that currently feels full circle is that as we approach their last two years of high school, I find myself checking on them as they sleep more; taking pictures of them while they're sleeping more; and lingering at bedtime more. Like I knew how fast their infancy would go, and I am also deeply aware of how fast their junior & senior years are going to go. 

Baking... four loaves of sourdough this week and loving that it's not stressful anymore. Now that I kind of know what I'm doing, I'm actually able to enjoy the process. It's so nice. 

Hosting... my sister and her girls for a playdate and it was so much fun! She gave Carly fake bangs with a cool trick she learned and they played Barbies, dolls, and even restaurant with an umbrella and everything. So cute!!! 

Swimming... with Carly one afternoon and having the neatest experience. There was a bee that kept coming to us in the pool wanting water. He would land on myself or Carly, suck water off our skin, and then leave. He'd come back about five minutes later. He repeated the process probably six times. It was so cool. 

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