Purchasing... new porch furniture at 50% off last weekend. I had been sitting in our one porch chair, dreaming of a small porch table (to hold my books & journal) and an additional chair when the kids and I ran to Rite Aid to pick up a prescription. There, as we entered the store, we saw all their outdoor furniture was on sale. It matched what we already had and I came home with both a chair and table for less than $25! I have already enjoyed them so much and love sitting out there with Josh after we've put the kids to bed.
Enjoying... pizza & movie night with the kids last weekend while Josh was out of town. Jack & Logan helped me make the pizza and we watched A Wrinkle In Time. It was really good. I love when we rent a movie that I enjoy watching with them!
Delighting... in Carly. She is constantly trying to make us laugh (like with her new silly face pictured above) and with what she says, like "Boom! Roasted!"when the boys are teasing each other. She has discovered a hand-me-down hat that she wears constantly, adorably. She is trying out potty training (all on her own) and is overjoyed at the m&m's she earns. She's pooped on the potty twice, which is amazing to me because it took the twins six months to finally be comfortable pooping on the toilet! When the boys go back to school I'll be jumping on the potty train wagon full time. After she goes I tell her I'm so proud of her, and she says back that she's so proud of me. Ha! She's grown so independent over the summer. She gets out her own toys and snacks and washes her hands all by herself in the bathroom, on her VERY tip toes on the stool. I am also loving her bedtime prayers. They consist mostly of what she's thankful for, which varies from her people (Grandma, brothers...) to her bed or strawberries. At the end she says, "In Jesus Name Amen", but all together like, "Injesusnameamen". It's just my favorite.
Taking... a day trip to Wenatchee to see my sister and her kids. The smoke from wildfires has kept the kids mostly stuck inside (especially Wyatt with his sensitive lungs) so my sister and I have gotten together each of the last two weeks. The smoke has cleared off & on, and we've taken advantage on days that have had clear patches, but mostly at our house it's been a lot of indoor play. So a change of scenery this week was lovely! The kids played so well together and Roxanne and I got to talk and play with each other's daughters.
Going... to counseling again this month. I slowed down to once a month for summer, but I think I'll pick back up to twice a month for fall. Especially seeing as Logan's seizures have picked up and Wyatt's asthma is likely to gain momentum as well with him going back to
This week we talked about what's working for me and how to continue that. I am working out nearly everyday, which helps my stress level a ton, but am also giving myself grace when I need to (like last week when Logan had his six minute seizure, I didn't work out, I just laid with him instead) and listening to what my body needs without judgment. He gave me a really neat story that I might share next week about how sometimes it's our job to put certain worries into God's inbox and that's been helping me as I have worried about sending Logan back to school with his seizures and stressed about Wyatt's school year after how much of last school year he missed from illness-related-asthma. Reminding myself to give it to God helps a lot. (...even if I have to give it to Him over and over cause I keep taking it back. ha!)
Playing... game after game of Hide & Seek. The kids are all obsessed and I swear it's the only thing getting us through these last two weeks of summer. All four kids can play, and they have come up with some awesome hiding places. The longest winning streak is Logan, who went six games in a row without being found. Added bonus of Hide & Seek is that Carly no longer counts out of order! Yesterday she counted to 8 by herself and didn't miss any numbers!
Making... slime twice with the kids. All three boys got kits for their birthdays back in June and I (being a brilliant, and humble, mother- hehe!) held onto them knowing there'd be a time in summer when we would desperately need them. We made it once with just our boys, and once with their friends when they came over. I joked with Josh and my mom and sister that I would be waiting for my trophy in the mail. I hate messes, and I hate making slime. So doing both made me pretty much feel like the best.mom.ever. Luckily, the slime held their interest for a long time after we were done creating it, so it was totally worth the time invested on my part. Even Carly loved making it and playing with it in her high chair.
Laughing... as Jack continued reading by nightlight when I turned out the lights and he wanted to read to the end of the chapter. He's a kid after my own heart!
Seeing... Wyatt's pulmonologist while she was visiting our town, which meant no two hour drive to Spokane (wahoo!) and the chance to get him all set for the new school year. We got him a new nebulizer (so now we have a back up!), a new peak flow meter (another back up!), emergency steroids in case he gets sick over the weekend (so we can avoid an unnecessary trip to the ER), and a prescription for 44mcg of Flovent, which is a preventative inhaled steroid that he will take 2 puffs of once a day starting now throughout the school year to give his lungs an extra boost. The hope is that this extra boost will keep him from nosediving so dramatically when he does get sick. Then when he is sick, we will switch him to 110mcg of Flovent 2 puffs, 2x a day for a week to get him through. Unless he's REALLY sick, in which case he'll be on Budesonide in the nebulizer. Gosh it's a lot to keep straight!
In addition to all that, we ordered him a new breathing part of the nebulizer called a PARI Reusable Nebulizer. It delivers more of the medication to the lungs and makes sure less is breathed out. It was recommended by our allergy doctor actually, back when Wyatt was allergy tested in June. I am excited to have so many different tools in my arsenal to help fight the asthma that tends to overtake him when he's sick.
Bummed... about Logan's seizure this week. He had a big one last week, and the one he had this week was very small in comparison, only maybe a minute long, but I was still hoping he wouldn't have any.
At bedtime one night this week Logan asked me why Jack doesn't have seizures and he does. It took all my will power not to cry while I was answering him. He wasn't being rude, just curious. He genuinely wanted to know why he has this affliction while his identical twin brother skates by without it. I told him about epigenetics and that once the egg split in utero their experiences started being different. And that those differences can turn off and on different parts of their DNA. He said he wants to ask his neurologist if she sees any other twins who have seizures whose twin doesn't have them, and he displayed a complete understanding of what I was saying because he responded with, "So Wyatt could be a twin, and his twin could potentially not have asthma." Bingo.
I often find myself trying to find reasons Logan has epilepsy. I dropped him twice as a baby (true story) and wonder if that's why. Once he fell off the changing table because I was distracted by Jack and the other time he fell off the rocking chair. He got less breastmilk than Jack because they recommended he not be at the breast because it was so much work for his tiny body. So he got a lot more formula. I also wonder if we had gotten him out sooner if he wouldn't have it. His growth had slowed so dramatically toward the end, but the weekly ultrasounds weren't catching it. They estimated him at nearly 6 pounds when in reality he was only 4 pounds at birth. I wonder about what I ate, what he's been exposed to... Maybe it's the Windex he sprayed in his own face at 18 months when he got under the sink that one time.
Then I come back around to the conclusion that it doesn't matter. It is what it is. He has it. And the who/what/when/where/why doesn't matter. We're here now. And we just have to keep marching forward, hard as it may be some days.
Accompanying... the twins to fifth grade orientation. We found out who their teachers are as well as who their classmates are. (They're in separate classes again this year. It's just what's best for them. They need their own space, their own friends and to not be constantly compared to each other. Plus it helps the staff with recognizing who is who.) We also had a meeting this week for Logan's seizures with his teacher and the school nurse. Until we get his seizures under control, he will have a buddy accompany him to the bathroom, around campus, and have someone designated in the classroom whom he will inform when he feels a seizure coming if he can't get to the teacher in time. All in all, I feel a lot better about the school year starting for him.
Sympathizing... with Jack, who has no friends in his class this year. Not only that, but he has a new teacher this year, after having the same teacher for the last two years (his only two years in public school). He's got so many nerves, the poor kid! I tried to console him with the fact that he'll really be able to focus on academics... but oddly that didn't comfort him a whole lot. Ha! #momperspective
Receiving... roses from Josh for no reason on Thursday. He got home from his first day of work (his school district starts before ours) with a dozen white roses for me because he'd been at the store shopping for supplies for his classroom and thought of me. I think it was his way of saying thank you for taking care of the kids and preparing for the school year. It's not as simple as it used to be with just buying clothes, shoes & school supplies. Now I have to deal with both Logan & Wyatt's medical issues and it's a lot to bear. I just love that he thinks of me. It's so heart warming & romantic.
Reading... very little. I looked at my reading list for August and it has one book (ONE BOOK!) on it. Goodbye, Vitamin is the only book I have completed this month. I got halfway through An American Marriage before it had to go back to the library. I also got halfway through Ghosted before I got bored and shelved it. I'm almost done with In Shock and am getting close to finishing No Cares About Crazy People on audio, so hopefully before the month is up I will have at least three finished books, but that is pathetic.
I am trying to figure out why that number is so low, and all I can figure is that Josh spent a lot of time out of town, so I was single parenting for a lot of it, plus we were on a family vacation for nine days, which did not allow for any reading time either. I am hoping I can make up for those low numbers in September because if I keep this up, I will not make my yearly reading goal!
***
Meditating on:
{I love this. I wish I knew who the artist was!} |
All week I have been ruminating on this.
Particularly the lines:
"Her roundness where I would like flatness,
Her softness where I would like firmness,"
So I am trying really hard to love my body
Just. like. this.
It's done so many amazing things for me,
(birthing four healthy children for one)
I owe it to myself to love it.
Without condition.
***