around here: week 21 2021

 {May 16-22nd}

Inviting... Logan & Jack's best friends over to swim.  Easton & Channing are also identical twins.  In their family they are #3 & #4 whereas Logan & Jack are #1 & #2.  Those boys are all like peas in a pod.  They're so good and have so much fun together.  I love their unique friendships. 

Enjoying... the twins' cooking.  They are making more and more dinners each week, and it brings me such happiness! They love cooking, (and I really don't!) so it's win/win!  

Going... to the doctor with Carly to talk to him about my muscle pain in my legs.  She played so well while we were there.  And I got some medicine to help with the pain I've been dealing with.  

Agonizing... over the sunburn all three boys have from last weekend.  They were cleaning the pool but they never got back out to put on sunscreen before spending the afternoon swimming.  Logan got the worst of it.  His turned into blisters all across his shoulders and back, and even gave him something called Hell's Itch, which I had never heard of before.  He woke up in the night with an intense itch under the sunburn, but the blisters were not anywhere near healing, so scratching them was agonizing.  He was near tears when he woke me up with this itching. 

Struggling... through these last weeks of school.  It feels like it will never end, and I am running out of steam. So are the kids. 

Running... errands with Carly and enjoying our alone time.  I know it's quickly shrinking with summer on it's way with brothers home full time. 

Taking... Carly on a bike ride one afternoon during a panic attack. My sister encouraged me to get out of the house and move my body in an attempt to overcome the physical symptoms.  It was really effective and I was grateful for the good advice. 

Going... on a walk with Josh after we laid the kids down one evening.  It was exactly what I needed. 

Shocked... that Josh has read more books than me so far this year! I have really slowed my reading down, focusing on other things, and he has amped up his reading this year.  He has a commute to work, so he uses that time to listen to audiobooks and that has him racking up books like nobody's business.  It's bringing out the competitive side of me. hehe. I'm hoping I can catch up in the summer. 

Looking... back on the twins' infancy & childhood as we approach their birthday next month.  Gosh they were so darn cute!!

Finding... Carly asleep in the hallway one night as Josh and I were headed to bed. I'm not sure what she was doing there, but it made me giggle. 

Contemplating... raising our kids without church, and deciding that it is the right thing for us. Every once in a while I wonder if our kids will miss out on certain things because we don't go to church.  But the risk that they may not know something about religion or the bible is worth knowing for sure that I am the only one pumping ideas & morals into them. (sidenote: if church works for you/your family, I am happy for you.  It's just not what's right for us.)

Freaking... out when I had a lip twitch that wouldn't quit on Friday.  I had already been having anxiety this week, and that was the final straw.  I gave in to temptation and medical googled, finding that lip twitches can be a sign of ALS, so I was convinced that I had ALS.  (Re-reading this to myself, it sounds ridiculous, but in the moment of my health anxiety, I always actually believe I have whatever I have convinced myself matches my symptoms. It's exhausting.)
This feeling triggered a full on panic attack and I broke down in sobs, exhausted after a week of anxiety and it's physical symptoms.  Wyatt and I had been watching Cars 3 together and I told him I was just having an anxiety flare up. I am never sure how to handle the kids when I am feeling that way... but I find honesty tends to be the best policy.  So I just told him I was worried about my twitch and it was giving me anxiety.  He hugged me and told me he was sorry I felt bad. We took turns soaking our feet in epsom salts and soon I started to feel better. 

Listening... to the "We Can Do Hard Things" podcast by Glennon Doyle & her sister, and loving it. Now every Tuesday I look forward to the new podcast they put out. 

Sending... the twins off to my parents house for the weekend, and enjoying a day with just my two littles.  We decided to take advantage of it just being the three of us, and went to the movies.  We saw Raya and The Last Dragon, which was so cute! And we enjoyed popcorn and candy and slushees.  It was so special. 

Feeling... like the fun mom when I said yes to Wyatt and Carly playing video games in the arcade area of the movie theater when our movie ended.  I love when I feel like the fun mom.  

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Around Here: Week 44 2020

Excited... that my parents moved to Wenatchee this week. Now instead of being 4+ hours away, they are a little over an hour away. I am thrilled for myself, for them, and for my sister (who also lives in Wenatchee). I love the idea of all the memories we are going to make together with them close by. 

Giving... the boys the NWEA test and feeling proud of their results.  They tried hard and gave it their all, which was great to see. 

Dealing... with multiple migraines this week.  It's so hard not to get down on myself when I'm feeling this way.  I have to remind myself that my migraines are not my fault.  And to give myself grace. 

Grateful... that at least my rescue meds work to get rid of my migraines.  I feel awful for some time after I take them, but within four hours the migraine is completely gone and I can go about my day. 

Notetaking... along with the twins, showing them how it's done, and learning about different geologic processes in the meantime. 

Having... a few hours to get things done when my friends' daughter came over to work as a Mother's Helper.  She came with a bag full of toys and games, and Carly was enthralled every minute. I got more done in those two and a half hours than I had the entire week beforehand. Hah!

Praying... for grandpa as he endures another week of chemo, and feeling grateful both that he has grandma and that he isn't feeling yucky from the chemo. Such blessings abound.

Getting... Carly ready for a little Halloween gathering with her grandma & little friend. She was so excited the whole day, counting down the time until the party.  These days it's truly the little things that bring us joy. 

Voting... and feeling anxious for the outcome. 

Sending... Josh with Wyatt to Wyatt's sleep study this week to see if his central sleep apnea continues to be a problem.  We will have a follow up appointment (where we will get answers & a chance to chat with the sleep specialist) in November. 

Holding... Carly as she fell asleep after coming downstairs sad after bedtime one evening. I can't remember the last time she slept in my arms, and it felt, as always, like magic. Time is such a thief.  

Carving... pumpkins with Logan, Wyatt & Carly on Halloween.  Jack isn't a fan of pumpkin carving.  The smell and feel of pumpkin guts makes him queasy. So he wasn't interested this year. Wyatt worked tirelessly on his 79lb pumpkin, and the results were fun.  Carly was especially excited when it got dark enough to light candles inside them. I just love her enthusiasm for life. 

Reading... The Beauty In The Breaking and Anne of the Island. The Beauty In The Breaking is interesting because of all the medical stories, but the heart of it just isn't there for me. Anne of the Island has been a slow read (I don't like to rush through Anne's books) but such a lovely, comforting read. 

Impressed... by Carly's ability to make herself a parfait.  Apparently she saw one on a cartoon, and then got herself our sundae dish out of the hutch and proceeded to layer yogurt, berries & granola bits. It looked adorable and was delicious!

Listening... to The Adult Chair podcast with Michelle Chalfant and learning about tapping points.  I have been blown away by how effective they are when I'm experiencing pain or anxiety. Highly recommend. 

Laughing... at Jack's eyes, largely dilated, after an eye doctor appointment.  We call them "cute eyes" and the boys like to try & ask me for things I'd normally say no to. Haha!

Burning... candles to create a cozy feeling at home during our school days.  I sometimes struggle with summer ending, but knowing I can try to enjoy fall with good books & yummy candles helps. 

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