7.13.2018

Around Here: Week 28 {2018}








 








Reading... and finishing The Book of Essie, The Stranger in the Woods and Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine.  I started Disappeared on audio and am finishing Four Seasons in Rome.  Then I plan to start This Is How It Always Is.  I got to choose my Book of the Month book for July and I chose Ghosted.  I also chose a bonus book, Goodbye, Vitamin, which I have heard good things about.  I can't wait to get my hands on them!

Feeling... so proud of my boys for forming a book club together with me.  It was all their idea, and they are hoping to read 600 minutes total by the end of summer.  They named it The Cunningham Book Club, or "CBC" for short.  We aren't reading the same books, we just get together to read at 7:00pm (bedtime) every night in the boys' room.  I bring whatever I'm reading and they bring what they're reading and we snuggle together and read.  It's so enjoyable. 

Swimming... at the pool with the kids twice this week before they headed out of town for Grandma's Camp.  I just love the relaxed vibe at the pool.  They play music over the loudspeakers, and the warmth of the sun makes the water so inviting... it's just my favorite place to be with the kids in the summer.

Laughing... hysterically as I tried to get Jack into my lap so I could hold him like a baby after bedtime stories one night when he was pretending to be asleep.  Carly thought it was hilarious and later Josh and I commented how we really can't believe it's been a decade since we rocked him and Logan with bottles in their mouths to sleep, and now they're both nearly as tall as I am. 

Enjoying... ten days seizure-free for Logan.  He went from Sunday July 1st until yesterday, July 12th, without a seizure.  Unfortunately, he had a seizure at Grandma's camp.  He called out that he was going to have one, Jack helped him sit down, and then he began having it.  It lasted two to three minutes and he recovered quickly. 
The good news is that he was having seizures every two or three days in June.  So going ten days is a huge improvement.  And today is the last day he will take his Trileptal (the old medication he was on after his first seizures back in early 2017), so hopefully the seizures will cease after this.  The Trileptal is not a good match for the new kind of seizures he's experiencing.

Grateful... for neighbors who let us do laundry (and even fold it for us!) at their house.  What a blessing as we wait for our washer to be fixed.  The part arrived last week, but the appliance place didn't have an appointment available until Monday. sigh.  I'm sure Josh could fix it, but we have appliance insurance, so we have to go through the company.  I am trying to remain optimistic... but nearly a month without a washer is a long time for a family of six!!!

Hitting... 169 pounds on the scale and feeling amazing about being in the 160's.  I have now lost 31 pounds since January and am very proud of myself.  Walking everyday and working hard to not emotional eat is the key! 

Fixing... up little areas around my house to bring me joy as I finally work through week three of Ordinary Magic, which my sister-in-law gifted me back in June.  I started by putting my rock collection in mason jars, instead of the old wipes container they had been in.  Now every time I walk past them, they make me smile.  I also cleared a shelf in my bedroom for putting my finished books this year onto.  Next on the agenda is clearing off my nightstand and hanging some photographs in my bathroom.  Just creating little spaces of joy throughout my home.

Reading... stories to Carly from the regular bookshelves, not just her bookshelf.  It's so exciting to read her new books.  I love watching her face take in the pictures. She often asks questions, or will choose the same book a night or two in a row, so she can get familiar with the new story.  Her current favorites are We're Going on a Bear Hunt and Big Smelly Bear.

Letting... Carly try using her potty when she asked this week.  She even actually peed in it!  I gave her m&m's and she was so excited to tell her brothers about it when we Facetimed them.  I'm not sure she's ready to try potty training full time, but I was proud of her for wanting to try it, and relieved she's not scared of it.

Loving... watching my children sleep.  Something about seeing them all curled up with their sweet little heads on their pillows, clutching their favorite stuffed animals, snuggled in their blankets, just sets my heart at ease and makes my mama heart beat a little slower.

***

7.07.2018

Around Here: Week 27 {2018}






















Reading... The Book of Essie (and really wondering what is going to happen!) and listening to Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine (and wondering how she is going to turn out!).  I am really enjoying both.  I also wrote two blog posts this week about books: One is a mid-year check in for my 2018 reading goals; and the other is my June Books post with mini-reviews of the eight books I read last month.

Sleep training... Carly again after getting home from vacation where she slept in bed with us.  She has been having nightmares (in one there were bears that she accidentally set free when she touched their paws through the cages and when they escaped, they wanted to snuggle her.  Then they were in her crib.  By the time I got in her room, she was straddling her crib like it was a horse and screaming, "Get me outta here!"  It was totally traumatizing! In the other, a little girl was putting wasps on her eyes and she couldn't see because of them.), not wanting to go to sleep and not wanting us to shut her bedroom door.  Needless to say, there have been some sleepless nights and looong bedtime routines in the Cunningham household as of late, but I think we have finally turned a corner and she's back to falling asleep quickly, thank the Lord!

Enjoying... being job free.  I honestly had no idea how much stress my job was adding to my life until Josh told me I could quit.  And now, just being a mom, I feel like I won the lottery.  I am so much more carefree and less stressed about time and sleep and everything!  It's ridiculous! I am able to read bedtime stories and linger longer with the boys at bedtime to talk and have heart to hearts (my favorite) instead of rushing them to sleep so I can go to sleep so I can be awake at 4:00 in the morning.  We can all feel the difference.

Playing... in our backyard.  The weather has been far more mellow this year than usual, only in the low eighties, so we've been mostly hanging at the house, not heading to the pool, each afternoon.  The kids put the sprinkler under the trampoline and fill up water balloons, they have squirt gun fights and I set up a "water table" of sorts for Carly with camp wash basins.  I read while they play.  It rocks.  Tons of fun, but with all the comforts of home.  It's just the best.

Allowing... the boys (and even Carly) to make their own pizzas for movie night last weekend while Josh was out of town helping his parents work on their house to prepare it for sale so they can move here (!!!).  They had so much fun choosing what they wanted to make (I'll be doing a post with pictures soon) and I felt like a fantastic mom for saying "yes" to fun.

Solo-momming... it while Josh was out of town for a few days helping his parents.  I worked really hard before he left to make sure that I could be a fun mom while he was gone, and we ended up having a great time!  Each night one of the boys got to stay up late with me and watch a movie and have a special treat.  They also got to sleep with me in my room.  I love that they still like spending extra time with me, and I cherish those memories.

Helping... our in-laws with their land and their new "tiny house" as they are preparing to move here.  We're hopeful they'll be here full time before summer is over (I cannot WAIT to have grandparents in town!) and it's been so amazing to witness all the work they have done both to their old house, to their new land and to their new temporary "tiny house" that will be "home sweet home" while they wait for their dream house to be built.  Josh and his brother, along with their nephews and sister, spent the week helping his parents build the shop, seen above with the picture of Logan who fell in the pit while playing on the land when Grandma and I were at the laundromat doing load after load of laundry.  The shop is huge, and the work they're doing is monumental.  They are such hard workers!

Washing... all our laundry at the laundromat on Thursday this week when Josh volunteered to take the boys with him to the land so Carol (his mom) and I could take just Carly with us to get all the laundry done.  I have been without a washing machine for three weeks now and I am just about to lose my mind.  I told Josh that I am going to be so grateful to do laundry in my own house, whenever I want, once the washer is fixed!!!  In the meantime, I am so grateful for the laundromat, and also for our neighbors who let us do emergency loads there (at least three a week) when something pops up between visits to the laundromat.

Walking... everyday this week with the kids.  It's been so good for my body & soul to walk (it's nearly two miles) each day, and the kids seem to enjoy it as well.  I am more patient, more kind and have more energy when we go after breakfast each morning.  I walk, pushing Carly in her stroller, and the boys ride roller blades, scooters or bikes, circling back and always beating me home.  They're so speedy!

Witnessing & recording... Logan having a seizure last Sunday.  Apparently as it began he was able to say, "Get her!" to Wyatt who yelled to me that Logan was having a seizure. So I ran into the room and began videoing so I can show the seizure to his neurologist who hopes to be better able to diagnose the location where these newer, absent seizures are beginning.  He has now been five days seizure free, and is down to only 300mg 2x a day of the Trileptal (read all about his recent neurology visit and medication change here) so we are hopeful that weaning him off the Trileptal is exactly what he needs now that he's on the right dose of Lamictal. 

Celebrating... the fourth of July with family, family, family!  Josh's parents, brother & nephew, as well as my parents, sister and nephews and niece were all here to help us enjoy the day, and what a fun day it was! Good food, water balloons, a game of Uno, Pop Its for the kids... just so much fun!!!

Taking... Wyatt to the emergency room at 7:00am Friday morning after waking up to him screaming in the living room and the twins running into the room yelling, "Mom! Wyatt's bleeding! Turns out he and the twins were having a really fun pillow fight until he fell and hit his head against the rocking chair.  The force of it split the back of his head open, and it was bleeding quite a bit.  Josh cleaned it (I couldn't do it because it was hurting him) as Wyatt nearly hyperventilated and asked repeatedly, "Am I going to be okay?" and as we got it cleaned up, I just couldn't tell how deep it was, so I told Josh I thought I better take him in.  The ER doc said we could have left it, and it probably would have been fine, but with all the summer activities (sweating, swimming, helmets) it will have a lower chance of getting infected with that one little stitch in there.  So she numbed it with some gel, and then stitched him up.  He was scared, and there were lots of tears, but he was also so very brave.  I was a very proud mama. 

Going... to the pool Friday with my parents and sister, along with her three kids.  Oh boy did we have a lot of fun!  All seven of our combined kids are fish, and they had a blast!  With four adults, we were easily able to divide and conquer and keep all the kids (mainly Logan, Carly & Roxanne's baby) safe.  The kids all listened really well and stayed close to their designated adults, which made me grateful, and we all ended up having a lot of fun.  I'll have more pictures coming in a post soon.  I LOVE taking pictures at the pool.  All the water and bright swim suits and smiling kids- what's not to like?!?

"There's two of them?! Are you kidding me?"  ;)
***

7.05.2018

Logan's June Neurology Check Up

Last week we took Logan back to the neurologist.  

His doctor wanted to check on him and see how he was adjusting to his new prescription of Lamictal.  Lamictal is the medication that took twelve weeks to slowly titrate him onto.  When he finally hit his goal  of 100mg 2x a day, though, he was still having seizures.  So the doctor upped it to 150mg 2x a day.  This was in addition to the 900mg 2x a day of Trileptal he has been on since his second seizure back in January of 2017.

At the appointment his doctor, who is an amazing deaf woman with the ability to read lips like nobody's business (although I signed throughout the appointment, because it felt rude not to since I have the ability) she patiently answered all my questions and we made some good decisions about Logan's future care.

To sum up what I learned:
Logan has both focal (starts in one place) 
and generalized (starts over the whole brain at once) seizures.  

*

His grand mal seizures (the ones where he shakes and falls down, like the one at school and the one in the hallway at home) that first lead to his epilepsy diagnosis back in 3rd grade (fall 2016/winter 2017) are focal (or starting in one place in the brain).   

*

His absent seizures (the ones where he has an aura beforehand and stares off into the distance while smacking his lips) could be generalized or focal, and that's why we're having a hard time controlling them.  Watching them more closely, and catching them on video (like I did last Sunday) will help his doctor better diagnose his type of epilepsy and choose the best medication for Logan, should the Lamictal not work. 

The absent seizures that are generalized are more likely to be outgrown whereas the absent seizures that are partial complex seizures are focal and less likely to be outgrown.  During an absent seizure that is focal (starting in one place in the brain) you will have an aura (sense that it is coming) beforehand (which Logan almost always does) but your eyes tend to go to the side, or roll back in your head, which Logan's do not.  He always stares straight ahead during his seizures.
During an absent seizure that is generalized (starts all over the brain at once) you don't usually have an aura beforehand, and your eyes are straight forward (like Logan's always are).  You also tend to come to quickly afterwards.  Needless to say, his symptoms are pretty confusing!

Unfortunately for Logan, I feel pretty confident that his are partial complex seizures because of how strong his auras are, which means he's less likely to outgrow them.  (Josh, my husband, also has epilepsy that he hasn't outgrown, which is another reason I assume Logan has this type of epilepsy.)

*

Further hits to the head (in the course of a "normal" ten year old day) will not make his epilepsy worse.  Only Traumatic Brain Injury or brain bleeds will do that. So I can stop freaking out.  As long as I keep him safe while in the water (bathing or swimming); don't let him climb too high (we don't want him having a seizure while he's up twenty feet in a tree); and make sure he always wears a helmet, he should be good to go.  

*

Some seizures can be preceded by intense physical activity as it seems Logan's have been.  However, our goal is to reach a medical point where his epilepsy medication controls the seizures so he can do whatever physical activity he wants without restriction.

*

We ended the appointment deciding to wean Logan off his Trileptal because it is only for focal, not generalized seizures and in fact, it can increase generalized seizures.  So he's currently down to 600mg 2x a day and next week we will go down to 300mg 2x a day.  By mid July he will be off Trileptal completely.  Our prayer is that we will see his seizures disappear after weaning him off this medication that is no longer appropriate now that his epilepsy has evolved from one type to another.  

*

His technical diagnosis is Primary Generalized Epilepsy, which is basically a really general term for what he has, and isn't descriptive at all.  It just says, "this kid has seizures."
His EEG shows broad based sharp waves in the left central region, so that's where his focal slowing (slowing in one area) is.  His generalized slowing occurs both when he hyperventilates and when he is exposed to flashing lights, as well as when he is sleeping.

Because of this, our family has had to skip the new Incredibles movie, which has some really severe flashing scenes that have caused seizures throughout the epilepsy community.  Super sad, but not worth the risk to our boy.

*

We left the doctor with instructions to call back in one month and let her know how it's going.  If it's going well, we will continue with just the Lamictal.  But if it's going poorly, we may wean him off the Lamictal and try a different medication for his two types of epilepsy.  Time will tell. 

I am grateful for you all, not only for your love & prayers, but for letting this blog be a safe place for me to work out my feelings as a mama.  It's been a really hard six months with Logan & Wyatt both needing more medically than they ever have before and I'm so thankful that whenever I post anything about Logan's seizures (or Wyatt's asthma), I am met with  nothing but love and support.  You are all amazing and I'm so thankful.

***

7.04.2018

2018 Reading Goal: Mid-Way Check In



We are halfway through 2018 now, (I can't believe it!) and I wanted to check in with my yearly reading goal.  First, I am on Good Reads now, and I'd love to be friends on there. (Click the link to find my profile.)  It's fun to keep track of my goals and books I want to read in the future on there.  I feel so late to the party. Ha!  I am also listening to more audio books than ever, using the Overdrive app to check out books from my library and listen for free.  

I have discovered this year, however, that as I gave up nursing in January, I no longer have an interest in reading ebooks.  I far prefer "real" books.  I just love them most!  

So far this year, six months in, I have read 36 books.  My goal is 60, so I feel confident I will make my goal.  I want to share with you three books I think you should read, three I think you should listen to, and three that I think you should skip.   

Books to Read:
Brain on Fire
by Susannah Cahalan
This was an amazing (true) book about the author's experience with mental illness.  I told my mom it was like a medical edition of 20/20 in a novel.  The author got a sickness that caused her mental illness and the book follows her account of the doctors figuring out what went wrong and how to treat it.  I was spellbound and could not put the book down!

The Great Alone
by Kristin Hannah
I also could not put down The Great Alone.  If you have ever said to me that you wished you had lived in Alaska, please read this book.  It's so good, and it gives a very accurate portrayal of life in rural Alaska.  The harshness and the beauty.  The desire for independence, and the need for community.  Gah, I just can't say enough- it was such a good book.  I underlined so many lines, and I felt like the entire book was a walk down memory lane to our time in the village.

The Nightingale
by Kristin Hannah
The Nightingale might be one of my top five best reads ever.  It's one of the biggest books I've ever read, and I read it in record time. I found myself carrying it with me everywhere I went.  It's about two sisters torn apart during World War II.  It is, like The Great Alone, un-put-down-able.

Books to Listen to:
Station Eleven
by Emily St. John Mandel 
Station Eleven was amazing. I listened to it, and I found myself looking for chores around the house that I could do while listening. Laundry? Yes please. Dishes? Sure! Anything so I could listen for ten more minutes.  It's a story that takes place in a post-influenza world where the entire infrastructure sort of crumbles.  The whole story is so well written, I found myself completely riveted, and I couldn't wait to find out what happened next.

Uncommon Type
by Tom Hanks
This was an unexpected delight that I listened to on audio, and fell in love with.  It's a collection of short stories that had me smiling and feeling light hearted and happy.  It made me want to write more and read more and live more.  The best part was that it was read by Tom Hanks himself, so I could really hear him as he told the stories.  Hear his heart. It was a fantastic book.  Nothing deep, but exactly what I needed.

Force of Nature
by Jane Harper
Last year I listened to The Dry by Jane Harper and loved it. Force of Nature was no different. I found myself using any excuse to plug in my headphones and listen for ten more minutes here and there.  It was a very good book, with many twists and turns and and an ending I did not see coming.  I highly recommend it!

Books to Skip:
Every Note Played
by Lisa Genova
Every Note Played is a book I had highly anticipated after loving every single other book by Genova (Love Anthony, Left Neglected, Still Alice, and Inside The OBriens), but it fell way, way short.  I hated all the characters in this book and felt the whole book was short on feeling.  The entire read left me feeling disappointed and let down.  My suggestion? Don't waste your time.

Happier At Home
by Gretchen Rubin
After having this book on my shelf for literally years (it came to Alaska and back with me!) I have to say I was sorely disappointed by it.  I had loved The Happiness Project and Better Than Before, and was enthused by the idea (as a homemaker) of a happiness project that focused solely on the home.  Instead what I got was a hodgepodge of random goals that Gretchen worked on for a year to make herself happier.  None of which seemed directly related to the home except for "Create a Shrine" which lead to some controversy on our Inspired Readers Book Club page and left us all feeling a bit confused about how we felt about our belongings. 
The book was good in that it did inspire us to look at our homes and our lives to find areas where we could improve our happiness, but it did not inspire me the way her previous books have.  My two cents? Skip it.


Cold Tangerines
by Shauna Niequist
This was a book club pick that I liked in the beginning, but by the middle felt like an uninspired collection of blog posts someone threw together and called a book.  There was nothing cohesive about them, and the author seemed kind of self important or whiny... It just wasn't the book for me right now.
***

So now it's July, and I'm currently reading five books, which is ridiculous, 
but it's summer time and the living is good. :)
I'm reading The Book of Essie; Four Seasons In Rome; Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine; This Is How It Always Is; and The Stranger In The Woods.  I am excited to wrap all of those up and start some of the new ones I got at Powell's and from my Book of the Month subscription which is the coolest thing ever-- You get to choose a new hardback book every month for only $14.99, and you can add an additional book for only $9.99! Such a good deal for new hardbacks.

What are you reading currently? What's been super good? What's been awful?

I'd really love to know what you're reading and what's waiting on your bookshelf.


***

7.03.2018

{Books} June 2018


The Queen of Hearts
by Kimmery Martin
The Queen of Hearts is like ER or Grey's Anatomy in a book.  It's about two doctors, best friends, and the secret that lingers between them.  It's a great read, one I very much enjoyed reading, especially because they also had families and I always enjoy reading about home life. 

The Woman in Cabin 10
Ruth Ware
I listened to The Woman in Cabin 10 on audio. It was so good, I could not stop listening.  It was a heart pounding book that kept me on the edge of my seat, dying to know what was going to happen next.

Seizures & Epilepsy in Childhood: A Guide for Parents
Seizures & Epilepsy is a book that I have been working my way through for a long time.  It's a heavy read, with lots of medical jargon, but one that is super helpful for parents of kids with epilepsy.  It helped me understand what's going on with Logan so much more than before. Currently we are trying to figure out if his seizures are absent seizures or complex partial seizures, which both look the same if you're not paying really close attention.  Knowing which type it is will better inform the doctor in the event that his current medication doesn't stop his seizures fully.   

Mrs. Fletcher
by Tom Perrotta
Mrs. Fletcher was an audio book I listened to, and it was quite risque. About a mother whose only son went off to college, she found herself quite lonely and up for anything when it came to company and relationships.  While it was entertaining, it was not necessarily a book I would normally have read. 

Siblings Without Rivalry
Siblings Without Rivalry was an easy read, with totally doable advice, which I will be doing a blog post about this month.  I was feeling at my wit's end toward the end of the school year and finally pulled this book off my bookshelf.  As the mom of three boys close in age, my main takeaway was "Don't compare in any way."  It has helped me to stop comparing the boys and let them each be their own, individual self which will help strengthen their relationship because it will decrease the amount of competition they feel amongst themselves.  Highly recommend it.

I'll Be Your Blue Sky
by Marisa de los Santos
I have loved many of de los Santos' books.  My favorite is Belong To Me.  I'll Be Your Blue Sky was good (a girl is having cold feet before her wedding and meets an old woman who gives her advice, and later her beach house!), but the writing was "meh".  It just didn't jump out and grab and me, and I didn't find myself wanting to stay up late and keep reading, which (to me) is the sign of a really good book. 

The Sweetness At The Bottom of The Pie
by Alan Bradley
I listened to this on audio, choosing it based solely on the name, having no idea what it was about, and found myself in love with the main character, a young girl named Flavia who ends up solving a crime.  I can't believe how much I enjoyed this story and how I can't wait to read the next book in the series.  If you are looking for a delightful, entertaining story that keeps things light (well, it was about murder... but the little girl is hilarious!) this might be the book for you! 

Tell Me More
by Kelly Corrigan
I have to admit, I was disappointed by Tell Me More.  It was kind of a downer, and a little bit of an "obvious" book to me.  The book is a collection of 12 things that the author is learning to say more of, including "no" and "I love you", and it just didn't speak to me the way it seems to have spoken to many others whom I know have read and loved it.  I adored Corrigan's book The Middle Place, so I expected myself to also love this one, but it just wasn't so. 


***

June Tally: 8
2018 Tally: 36
Yearly Goal: 36/60

7.02.2018

Twin Birth

{Friday June 6, 2008}
The boys were born on the day I hit the 37 week mark.  My contractions started at 2am.  By 6am they were intense enough that I woke Josh up and told him he should call in to work.  We arrived at the hospital at 8am.  At 10am when Dr. Plaut came in to check on my progress she said I was dilated 1cm, which meant that the labor was progressing. She suggested we do the c-section, and scheduled the OR for 2pm.  (We had planned a c-section in advance due to Logan being so small & face down, but Jack being transverse- across my belly- and the larger of the two.)
When she said she was scheduling the OR Josh and I high fived! We were so excited! Later the fear crept in:  This was major surgery. I was worried about the boys' sizes and health.  Knowing our lives would never be the same. But luckily Josh has a way of calming my fears.  He held my hand, let me cry and told me it would be okay.  In my heart, I knew he was right.

At 2pm we walked down to the OR and Josh waited in the hall while I had my spinal done.  When he came in, he sat in a chair by my head and we waited.

At 2:54pm Logan Henry (Baby A) came into the world crying. To hear his cry, was the sweetest moment of my life. I had finally become a mother.

At 2:55pm Jack Sawyer (Baby B) came quietly into the world.  When Dr. Plaut said he had arrived, I felt complete.

 I had done my  job.  I had grown those babies and delivered them safely into the world.

 After the boys were born they were taken to the NICU (aka the nursery) to be monitored.  Josh went with them. They were concerned about the boys keeping their blood sugars up. And about Logan keeping his body temperature.  Meanwhile I was wheeled to recovery.

 A short time later they brought the boys in to be nursed.  But first I got to just hold them.  Finally, after months and months of dreaming about holding these babies, they were in my arms. Already I felt torn by there being two of them. If I looked at one, I wanted to be looking at the other!  I couldn't believe there was really two of them.

I was informed that Jack was going to stay with me from that point, but that Logan would be taken back to the NICU.  So I took advantage of him being in the room to nurse to feast my eyes on this tiny boy.  His small size was completely shocking to me. I couldn't believe I had had a four pound baby!
 Everything about him was miniature and perfect.

 On the way back to the NICU after nursing Josh & Logan ran into Grandma Carol. She was so overjoyed for these boys to arrive.

 During the 18 hours Logan was in the NICU Josh traveled back and forth between our two rooms. I was unable to walk (from the spinal) so he fed, changed and kept Logan company. Then he came back and did the same for Jack & I.  He was amazing.
This is our favorite picture of Logan in the NICU. He looked so tiny on Josh's forearm.

 Here is Logan all hooked up in the NICU.
He was just the most precious thing I'd have ever seen.

 While Logan was in the NICU with Josh, I focused solely on Jack.  He was named after Josh. Josh's initials are JAC, and we thought Jack would be fitting, since we didn't want a junior. And Jack looked exactly like Josh.  It was unbelievable.

The day after the boys were born my sister flew home from California, and when she walked in the room, I nearly cried. I didn't realize how much I had wanted and needed her there. I needed her to see my babies, hold my babies, love my babies alongside me. And oh did she love them!!!
 I love this picture of her with Logan because of how alert he is. He was always like this.  Like my wise old man, just taking it all in.

My mom had been there off and on from the get-go.  She was there while I got prepped for surgery and she took care of me in recovery while Josh was with the boys in the NICU.  She took incredible care of myself and my boys.  With two babies for Josh to care for, and myself recovering from surgery, that third set of hands was much needed.

 The Cunningham Twins
{Logan & Jack}

 Logan Henry

 Jack Sawyer

On Monday, it was time to go home.  We put the boys in their car seats, packed up and headed out.

  This was my favorite sight... My husband carrying our precious babies out to the car, to go home together.

And so began our adventure as a family of four.