around here: week 15 2020

{pc: Jack}

Starting... the week with a migraine and sleeping half the day Sunday.  I know it was much needed, but I hate wasting the day sleeping!!

Finishing... Wyatt's wolf dot-to-dot and putting it into the frame my mom bought for him to put it in. It looks amazing and was so fulfilling to complete.  I'm so proud of us!!

Receiving... crafts from Grandma & using them with the kids this weekend.  We made stress balls which was super fun and Carly & Wyatt painted some little ceramic critters as well.

Cleaning... house Monday while Josh and the boys laid rock in the front yard with "cowgirl" Carly's help.  The rock looks so amazing!! I am super grateful for Josh and the boys' hard work, as well as my in-law's for letting Josh pilfer the rock off their land ;) for our use.  The yard looks so good!!

Noticing... that Carly's eyes are turning green after being blue all her life.  The boys' eyes all did the same thing, but not until they were about six or seven.

Reading... so many books, it's kind of ridiculous. I went from not reading like anything at the end of March (thanks COVID stress) to reading all.the.books in April.  I'm reading The Stress Solution, It's Not Supposed To Be This Way, Untamed, The Untethered Soul, The Bookshop on the Corner, The Making of Us (on audio) and Saving Lucas Biggs (also on audio), which I finished with the boys this week. 
I have been waking up early every morning and getting the majority of my reading done during that time.  I read one chapter each of The Stress Solution & It's Not Supposed To Be This Way.  Then throughout the day I can pick up Untamed and The Bookshop on the Corner.  The Untethered Soul is al little more to digest, so I am taking it slow. 

Hearing... officially that our schools will not resume for the 2019-2020 school year.  I thought hearing word from the governor would feel like a relief, but instead it had me feeling really overwhelmed and sad.  I'm hoping with more time I will come to feel better about it all.

Consuming... massive amounts of coffee.  Having all four kids around 24/7 is no joke.

Laughing... when Carly wore her fanciest clothes on our bike ride one day this week.  She had on her pink Minnie mouse dress-up dress, her gold sweater with the diamond buttons, and sparkly gold shoes with her pastel pink cat helmet. Hah!

Loving... our daily bike rides so much.  Something about the feeling of the wind on my face brings back that free feeling of childhood and I love it so much. 
I'm also loving all the blooming cherry trees around our neighborhood.

Giving... Josh the day off Wednesday.  He went to his parents' land to work on some projects and I managed the kiddos.  We had a picnic in the front yard, much to Carly's delight; went on a bike ride where I got to pull Carly for the first time this year (oof!); and the boys decided to switch bedrooms!  Wyatt & Jack are now sharing what used to be the twins' room and Logan is having his own room in Wyatt's old room.  They did an amazing job of switching everything with very little help from me. 

Facetiming... with my mom.  I was telling Josh that I don't think he's ever talked so much to his brother, whereas I have never talked less to my mom, sister & best friend.  I am just so busy with all the kids home, and I am so emotionally drained that when I have a minute, the last thing I often want to do is pick up the phone.  Plus, having another adult here means that I often just vent to him instead of needing to reach out to my girls the way I used to.
So that's something I am working on.  Because I want those relationships to stay strong!!

Watching... Little Fires Everywhere at the urging of my mom and sister, and being completely sucked in.  Although I'll admit, I find myself identifying closely with Elena, which disturbs me.  Her organization, her desire to control everything, her sunshiny disposition even when everything is going to pot... Hah!!

Enjoying... my day off Thursday.  I literally locked myself in our bedroom upstairs and Josh took care of the kids from sunup to sundown. I took two naps, did tons of reading, watched a movie, painted my nails and started my new diamond dot art.  It was just the loveliest day.  Josh even brought me dinner!!

Cheering... when I saw the boys finished their donut puzzle during Josh's bedtime readaloud Thursday. 

Finally... decorating Carly's bedroom with Josh's help, as well as getting the laundry room shelf we ordered hung.  I've wanted a shelf in there since we moved in.  This quarantine time allowed that to finally happen, and I couldn't be happier.  It's way more convenient than storing the detergent and softener in the cupboard or on the ground, plus it looks cute!!
Carly's room feels like a dream come true.  She's never had her own room before living here, so decorating a pink room, all for her, with that new beautiful color on the walls, was lovely.  She has so many pieces of art from all her people- the "Do good, Avoid evil" by Mary Englebreit was mine when I was little; the big "C" is something she painted with Grandma Carol; the mirrored word "Dream" above her bed was made for her by Aunt Julie; my best friend Shana gifted us the curtains; Aunt Roxanne gifted her the bunny picture you see; my friend Kori took the newborn picture that I have framed in there; and my mom made the blanket that's draped over the rocking chair and folded on the end of the bed.  So much love for a little girl. It felt really magical to pull it all together.

Celebrating... our twenty year dating anniversary on Saturday. (I blogged about it here.)  We didn't do anything special. Just enjoyed our family with pizza & cookies that night and bought the new Sonic movie.  The kids were thrilled.  #parentlife

Grateful... for this week off.  We really needed a spring break to sort of regroup before we get back to school and our regular routine. I am so thankful we worked so hard last week so we could take this week for some downtime.

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Around Here: Week Eight {2018}

(Carly's meatball machine)

(tumbleweeds that blew in our garage)

 

(Talking to my mom like a big girl)

(Jack's socks...like on the daily)

Pouring... myself into motherhood as I nursed two very sick kids to health over the last week.  First Logan, then Wyatt came down with terrible sore throats and other symptoms.  Wyatt's symptoms also included headaches and vomiting, whereas Logan suffered super high fevers. Wyatt ended up with an ear infection in addition to whatever was causing his sore throat and missed school all week.  We are all exhausted and ready for him (and Logan) to be fully well.  The nice thing is that Josh was around a lot thanks to Presidents Day weekend and was cheering me on.

Making... homemade chicken and dumplings (from scratch) for the kids this week in hopes it would help them feel better.  I made a huge batch and we've all been eating leftovers for days.  They loved it, and I'm so glad to have the recipe, which was handed down to me from my mom.  (Thanks mom!)  I was chatting with her as I made it, and Carly was so cute, talking to her (she was on speaker phone) and sitting at the bar like a big girl.  She cracks me up so much these days!

Finding... about 100 pictures of my mom on my phone after the twins facetimed with her this weekend.  They sure love their Nanny!  Thanks for always making time for them, mom!

Grateful... Logan's medicine is now controlling his seizures and his antibiotics seem to be taking care of his sore throat (that we're pretty sure was strep throat), so he is on the road to recovery and even went back to school Thursday & Friday this week.

Freezing... with lots of wind, but no more snow this week.  It has been super cold, which means lots of bundling up for Jack, who is the only one who attended school all week.  I'm glad we enjoyed the snow when we had it!

Laughing... last weekend when Jack had the big garage door open and three huge tumbleweeds blew right in.  I'm still not used to tumbleweeds being part of my everyday life.  Growing up the only time I saw tumbleweeds was on morning cartoons! Now they regularly roll into my car as I'm driving, or my garage if it's a windy day.

Working... on my puzzle a lot this weekend as we were all homebound with Logan sick and Josh out of town.  It's a beautiful puzzle, and I enjoy working on it, but if I leave it out for too long, Carly and the cats take it apart.  (George will pull pieces out with his teeth!) So before I go to bed at night I have to cover it up with books or board games so they don't play with the pieces when I'm asleep!

Thankful... for good friends who checked on us (Barb! Leah! Amanda! Thank you!) and sent us food (Kori!) to get us through the weekend while Josh was away and I was caring for sick littles.  My village is amazing, I tell ya!

Participating... in an address-based census reading that lasted two weeks and required a LOT of specific note-taking on my part about where we spent money over the last fourteen days.  It ended yesterday and I'm so glad.  What a pain in the rear!  Especially the weekly grocery shopping trips!

Being... at my best during this hard time of parenting.  It's funny how the hardest things can sometimes bring out the best in us.  It was nice to end these last few days feeling awesome about myself, not doubting myself as is often the case.

Finishing... Happier at Home and Purple Hibiscus while the kids were sick last weekend.  Happier at Home has been somewhat inspiring but nowhere near the level of The Happiness Project.  Purple Hibiscus was an entertaining book (that's the wrong word... but I can't think of a better one), but it ended quite darkly and was kind of a downer, honestly.

Reading... instead of sleeping.  I started The Great Alone after my mom sent it to me last week and I have not been able to put it down. It's so good.  It's about a family who moves to Alaska and it is bringing me back to the five years we spent in rural Alaska as a family.  It's been a fun time reminiscing.  It makes me want to write a book about our adventure there!
I'm also listening to The Wisdom of Sundays, which is so good. I just love Oprah.  It's offering me so many insights, like this nugget: anxiety & depression are caused when we believe our thoughts. So much food for thought!

Focusing... on the present moment, and trying to stay in it, no matter what emotion it is currently eliciting.  For instance, this morning, the neurologists office called me back to discuss Logan's one year check up for his seizures.  The appointment is in May and I was wondering if they wanted an EEG since his seizures have changed from grand mal seizures to petit mal seizures.  I would like to have one to see if we can figure out why/how they have changed. 
The nurse got right back to me and said the doctor agreed that it would be prudent to have another EEG and that the team would be getting back with me shortly to schedule the EEG and follow up appointment.  Once we hung up, I jumped in the shower and promptly burst into tears. 
Is it the end of the world that Logan has epilepsy? No.  Is it the end of the world that his seizures are changing? Or that we've had to increase his dose twice this year? No.  But sometimes, the weight of all his medical issues is heavy.  And it hurts my heart.  And worries my mind.  And I wish it didn't exist for him.  And for me.  So I let it all out.  I cried.  And I prayed.  And I cried some more.  And then I felt better.  Because in that moment I had been sad, so I had cried. 
In the next moment, I had a nine year old who was just like any other nine year old, fighting with his brother while he unloaded the dishwasher, me threatening to ground him as I pulled on yesterday's jeans and wondered how we were going to make it to drop off on time.  And that's how staying in the moment works.  You take life as it comes.  If you stay in "right now", you really can handle just about anything that comes your way.  I'm not perfect at it, but each day it's getting easier.

Loving... so much Carly's little personality.  She answers the TV when she watches Team Umizoomi.  She plays so intently with her little toys (this week she was using her cooking toys to make a "meatball machine") and she says "sorry" to her animals when she drops them.  I am loving her post-nap snuggles (she finally quit waking up angry. woo hoo! praise the lord!) I can see, now that the twins are nine and Wyatt is six, just how fleeting this time with Carly really, truly is.  So I am working hard to cherish it.  I am also working hard to cherish bedtime with the boys.  Because the time with them is fleeting just the same. So I am taking the time to tuck them in, listen to their little stories, their worries, their prayers and their hearts because I know if they share the little things now that they will share the big things later.  It's so good for all our souls.

Accepting... (with deep resignation) that one of every two pair of socks the twins owns has a hole in it.  And they will never (ever) throw them away on their own. Ever.  Why is that?!?  These are the mysteries of life people. Seriously.  It's ridiculous. I think I have had Jack throw away at least one sock a day for the last week. We keep all the mates and are just wearing mismatched socks because at this rate we are going to go broke buying new socks.
In all seriousness, though, mamas.  What socks do you buy? Is there some amazing sock brand that can withstand the wear and tear of a set of rough & tumble twins? Or should I just give up and let them wear the holey socks? The thing is, I just don't think I can. It is driving me bonkers!

Adoring... Wyatt's constant amazement at life.  This morning after we dropped the twins off at school he opened the sunroof cover (just the ceiling part, not the actual sun roof) in the car, and saw the fern frost that had collected on the glass above our heads and was completely mesmerized.  Yesterday he asked me how long numbers went on, and when I told him they went on forever, he thought about it for a while, and then responded, "Wow, really? Cool."  Then at bedtime when I said, "I love you one hundred thousand." He responded, "I love you forever. Actually. I love you as long as numbers go."  He's always thinking, taking in the world around him, and it's so fun to see the world through his perspective.  He's just my favorite.

Feeling... ready for summer.  Is that ridiculous to say? I am so tired of being cold.  And having sick kids.  And being cold.  And talking about gloves.  And being cold.  And having the kids in the house all the time. And being cold. Did I mention I am tired of being cold? Hah!

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Around Here: Week 20

Waking... a little earlier than usual most days this week, which helped me keep my temper and not feel so rushed as we prepared for school.  I also got lunches made ahead of time most days, which was lovely.

Deciding... to do all my jobs without complaining (even internally) this week and selflessly giving in ways that would benefit my family.  I wasn't perfect at it, but I felt so much more positive and fulfilled because of it.

Chasing... Carly all over the world.  Any time she is free, she's-a-going!

Sticking... Carly in her stroller for all.the.things because of her roaming ways.  She is in it when we go to the doctor, when we walk the boys to school, when we take Wyatt to practice or attend the twins' baseball game.  Chasing her just wears me out, and I want to be able to watch the games, so there she sits, stuck as stuck can be, and I wonder, wearily, when she'll stop wandering away from me!

Noticing... little ways that Wyatt is growing up.  This week at school he wouldn't let me wipe his mouth (he had toothpaste on his lip), blow his nose or hug him goodbye. (Cue all the tears!) I also noticed that during his bedtime prayers instead of "Thank you for mommy and daddy" (like he used to always say) he now says, "Thank you for mom and dad."  Pardon me while I sit on the couch crying, tending to my freshly broken heart.  ;)
I am so proud of how far he has come in his independence (getting dressed, doing chores, making his own lunch) and his knowledge (asking Josh last week "I don't know if you'll know the answer to this dad, but how did God make the first humans?" and asking me, "How do we know the center of the earth is that hot?") and his maturity ("I'll just have to wait," when I am taking care of Carly or "I can help!" when he sees me get frazzled in the mornings), but along with his growing there have been a few growing pains (standing to pee means some pee on the floor; saying "mom" instead of "mommy"; and not wanting any public displays of affection).  Thank goodness God knows to make all kids different so I still have three that will hug me anywhere, any time!

Finishing... the bird puzzle I'd been working on. It was a hand-me-down puzzle and I was sad to find it was missing two pieces, although I still enjoyed it.  Also the twins and I finished The Magic Finger, a very short story by Roald Dahl.  They liked it a lot.  I personally finished Anne of Avonlea and The Inheritance this week.

Does anyone else feel like listening to an audio book is cheating? Josh has started listening on the drive to work (he has a 30 minute commute each way) and he recently "read" (listened to) The Great Gatsby and I said I was jealous he read such a great classic and he said it hardly counts since he didn't actually have to read it, just listen. It made me realize I feel the same way. I feel like listening to someone else read to me as I go about my chores is cheating somehow.  So funny.

Although I will say that listening to audiobooks has upped my "books read" list remarkably, and I will hit my Year-Long "24 Book" goal by the end of May. Amazing!  (I use the Overdrive app to check out books from my local library. You add your library using your library ID # and password-- for most libraries it's the last four digits of your phone number-- and then you can check out books to read on Kindle, or audio books to listen to on the Overdrive app itself.  I love it so much!)

Reading... three new books.  Yesterday I started The Magic of Motherhood, which was a gift from my friend Angie with the idea that when I finish, I'll send it along to another mama, who'll send it to another mama, and on and on, creating a village of mama's, all tied together by a book.  I love the idea so much.

I also started Into the Water by Paula Hawkins, who wrote The Girl on The Train, and The Here and Now by Ann Brashares, who wrote The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.  I also made my SUMMER READING LIST (!!!) which I will be sharing sometime next week, along with my recap post about Screen Free Week and a few other I've had sitting my queue.

Enjoying... Mother's Day gifts from my children, and fresh flowers from our neighbor.  Oh, how I adore the smell of lilacs in a vase in my house, and sweet words from those boys I love so much.

Praising... my husband for his amazing home improvement skills.  He was able to take our sprinkler system, which hasn't worked in a few years according to our neighbors, and give it a second life.  He's been digging and plumbing and troubleshooting, and finally, on Sunday, he got the entire system working-- front, side and backyard.  I am beyond impressed!

Thankful... Josh took Wyatt to practice for me Wednesday so I could keep Carly and the twins home for an early bedtime.  The twins have been doing state testing this week at school, so early bedtime has been a must.  I'm also thankful for some new friends who had the twins over all day last Saturday.  It was so luxurious to only have two kids to chase after!

Eating... our first meal in the backyard on our picnic table! Thursday night Josh grilled up some burgers real quick before we had to divide & conquer (he took the twins to their game; and I took Wyatt and Carly to Wyatt's).  Dinner was delicious, and we were all so happy to be eating in the sunshine.  I look forward to many  more meals like that in our future.

Watching... Anne with an E, which had perfect timing seeing as I just finished reading Anne of Green Gables again.

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