Week 3 Around Here {2019}

Taking... Wyatt and the twins to birthday parties Saturday afternoon.  It was nice for them to have a chance to get out of the house for a while, and Josh picked them up, which was great.  While they were gone, I went on a walk with Carly, which wasn't necessarily what I wanted to do, but it was definitely what I needed to do.
The weather was beautiful, and we even met a super friendly kitty on the way home, which absolutely made Carly's day.

Putting... hardwood flooring down in our house. (It's actually composite click-lock flooring that looks like hard wood but is waterproof/kid proof. It's amazing!)  Josh and his brother Samuel worked their tails off this weekend moving furniture and laying flooring, getting our room, the boys' room and Carly's room finished, as well as half of the hallway. 
While the flooring looks awesome and is a dream come true, living in the mess with four kids in 1400 square feet in the middle of winter made for a bit of a long weekend for all of us. Ha!  We were all very glad when the furniture could make its way back into each room and life resumed normalcy.

Experiencing... some physical anxiety in the early parts of this week.  I think some of it was due to the chaos in our house with all the renovating, but a lot of it was due to anticipating Wyatt's tonsil and adenoid removal Friday.  None of our kids have ever had surgery, and with Wyatt's asthma, I was really nervous about him being put under.  Because of that, I made sure I worked out every day this week, and it made a huge impact. 

Putting... stickers on the calendar in the kitchen every day that I exercised this week.  I remember from when I read Better Than Before by Gretchen Rubin, that keeping track is often the best way to make a habit stick.  Plus I am like a kindergartner and love the positive feedback that little sticker gives me every time I get to put it on the calendar. Hah!

Giving... our boys the Love Language Test to see what their primary love languages are in an effort to improve my connections with them.  It was really interesting to see the results.  Logan prefers Quality Time & Receiving Gifts; Jack prefers Physical Touch & Quality Time; and Wyatt prefers Words of Affirmation & Quality Time. 
What struck me is that each of my kids desires TIME.  As a mom of four kids, time is not necessarily something I have a lot of! So I am going to have to get creative there.  The other ways they prefer to be shown love are really good to know as well.  I am hopeful that knowing these will improve our relationships moving forward.

Snuggling... Wyatt as much as possible leading up to his surgery. We spent a lot of time talking about his surgery, recovery and all the questions that he had.  He's such a little buddy, and I just soaked him up this week.

Reading... Troublemaker by Leah Remini.  I finished it, and gave it 5 stars.  I absolutely loved it.  (Go here to read more about my thoughts on her leaving the church)
I finished How To Walk Away during Wyatt's surgery, and I really enjoyed it. I would say it is a solid 4 star book, such a sweet read, with likable characters, and a compelling storyline (plane crash + following recovery).  The writing was beautiful and I liked the ending.
I have been reading one chapter each day of Girl, Wash Your Face, and I cannot stress enough how inspirational this book is. When I am all the way finished with it, I plan to sit down with my journal and write my thoughts about the things I have underlined in it.  So many gems in there.
When I finished listening to Troublemaker, I started listening to The Rainbow Comes & Goes, which is written by Gloria Vanderbilt and Anderson Cooper (and is read by them as well) and is really interesting to listen to.  I love memoirs and have found that I only like listening to audio books if they are thrillers or memoirs. So I am sticking to those genres this year, and reading books off my shelf the rest of the time.

Geeking... out that Katherine Center, the author of How To Walk Away, commented on my Instagram post about how I didn't want to clean my house, I wanted to lay on the couch instead and read her book.  I love how social media can connect us with people we would normally NEVER have contact with.  I think she is the third author to comment on my Instagram account, and it never fails to give me heart palpitations. #booknerdforever

Kon Mari'ing... the office & the boys' toys as I continue through the house in order to stay sane leading up to Wyatt's surgery at the end of this week.  The office was challenging, but really rewarding.  It feels so good to walk in there now and know that all the craft items I kept are things I really love and will use, and to know where everything is.
The boys' toys were another thing that were hard to sort.  But I made them do it, and they made a big dent in their stuff, plus we sorted them into "like" items, which makes them more likely to play with them. 

Crying... as we left the orthodontist office this week, as our orthodontist is the most amazing guy, and he is determined to help fix my kids' teeth, whatever the cost.  Putting the twins in braces will be expensive (as you can imagine) and they have some pretty severe issues, so when we were discussing the finances, he said that whatever needs to happen, he can help us out, he wants to help us out. He said that after all we have been through with Logan and his seizures in the last year, we could really use a win.
The rest of the day, I could not stop randomly bursting into tears. I mean, who does that? Who helps out like that? Who sees a need they can fill and just fills it? There are such amazing, good, kind, generous people in this world, and I am so blessed to be surrounded by them. It is humbling and beautiful.

Thankful... for friends who brighten my week.  Hanging with my girl Shana on Wednesdays is a definite bright spot in my week, and my friend Jen watched Carly for me Thursday so I could go to the dentist, and getting to visit with her at drop off and pick up put a huge smile on my face as well.  I love how every week God shows me why he moved me here, and that I belong here, in this village. 
I am also thankful for Uncle Samuel who showed up at our house Tuesday while the boys and I were in the throes of Kon Mari'ing their toys as Josh worked late, and made dinner as we sorted & organized.  It was no big deal, he said, but to me, it was a very big deal.

Celebrating... Carly being completely potty trained.  It took less than a week, and you guys, I seriously did nothing other than buy m&m's.  (I mean, the girl is seriously motivated by chocolate, but the truth is, she was just ready.)  She's so dang cute in her little underwear, and you can just tell, she is really proud of herself.

Grateful... my mom was able to come and stay for the long weekend to help with the other kids for Wyatt's surgery.  She has been helping around the house, taking Carly & the twins to run errands and go do fun things... it's been such a blessing.

Praying... as Wyatt went in for surgery to remove his tonsils & adenoids Friday morning.  He was so brave, he never shed a tear at the hospital, and thanks to all your prayers for peace, neither did I.  He did great during surgery, and the doctor was able to get both his tonsils & adenoids out easily.
But after his surgery, when he was coming off the anesthesia, whenever he would fall asleep, he would stop breathing.  His oxygen, which was 99 or 100 when he was awake, would drop rapidly- 97, 94, 87, 83, 79, 77, 72, 68, 65, 60... bottoming out at one point at 33%. 
Now to give you some perspective, when Wyatt was hospitalized with Status Asthmaticus in the PICU, in December 2017, his oxygen was 73 and that had the doctors in the ER freaking out. So 33 is unheard of. 
When this was happening, his entire body was completely still, heavy and unmoving, like he was dead, with no breath coming in and out of his lungs. It was absolutely terrifying.
As soon as we woke him up, he would begin to breathe again, and be fine.  But the second he fell asleep, his body would forget to breathe, and he would desaturate again.  I was freaking out.
His doctor came in and told us that this was his Central Sleep Apnea manifesting and being made worse by the anesthesia.  So it was just a waiting game.
Thankfully, as the anesthesia wore off, he was able to fall asleep and his oxygen would drop off only into the 80's.  By the time we were home and he was getting ready for bed, 9 hours later, he fell asleep and his oxygen didn't drop at all.  I cannot tell you what a relief that was to me. (And how grateful I was to have the oxygen meter I ordered last fall to better monitor his asthma!)
The recovery time should take about two weeks, with lots of ups & downs, I am told, so your continued prayers would be such a blessing to us.  Currently, I am just glad to have the surgery (and those scary not-breathing episodes) behind us and to be on the road to recovery.

On parenting... I read the following quote this week, after the terrible parenting week I had last week (where I was left feeling like a total failure on all accounts) and I like the idea that our mistakes are just ways to learn how to do better next time.  Maybe if I can remember this gentle advice from Brene, I will be less hard on myself.
I seem to think that parenting requires perfection.  And the more I think this, the more I screw up, because the pressure is so high. 

Maybe just loving my kids and doing my best is all I can do. 

And that is enough.

***

And for a little laugh:

I will fold my socks for you, Marie Kondo.

But I will not get rid of my books.

That's where I draw the line.

*

Week 2 Around Here {2019}

Watching Christopher Robin with Logan, Wyatt & Carly on movie night. It was such a cute movie, I didn't want to miss a minute. Pooh said so many quotable things!! I absolutely loved it!!  I also watched Birdbox on Netflix this week, with Josh, and it was really good.  Highly recommend both.

Undecorating for the holidays.  I did this slowly, over the course of several days, which is very unlike me, but the boys' school schedule was weird this year and they didn't go back until January 7th, so I had lots of time to do as I pleased following the new year.  Eventually it all got done, and Josh took down the tree and Christmas lights outside, and Christmas was wrapped up for another year.

Sending the kids back to school this week after two weeks off for Christmas.  It was time for them to go back, and we were all ready for a routine again after so much free time.  We had a great Christmas break, but the boys missed their friends & I missed my quiet time. (mom truth)

Celebrating nearly a month seizure free for Logan.  I am so excited that his new medication (Depakote) is working and we are now weaning him off his old medication (Tegretol). Woot woot!

Potty training Carly, who is actually, basically, potty training herself.  She is amazing and had only two #2 accidents and then took to the toilet like a fish to water when she realized that if she poo'd in her Paw Patrol panties, I was going to throw them away. She is crazy grown up and blowing us away!  The only negative to her potty training is that her sleep took a bit of a backslide as she became aware of herself peeing and I think it started waking her in the night. I'm sure it will improve with time, but I was tiiiiired this week as she woke me up a few times each night.

Counting down the days until her birthday (it's on the 24th) and feeling both right and shocked that she will be three.  She is so mature for her age (and that vocabulary!), but also I can't believe it has already been three years since she joined our family.  Time is sure a funny thing.

She was a big girl at the dentist this week and when she goes next time, she gets to sit in the big girl chair and watch a movie on the ceiling, which she is PUMPED about (!) and when my friend Jen asked her how old she was turning at the end of the month, she promptly answered without pausing, "Fifteen." Hah!  This girl. I am just cherishing every.single.moment with her. She is so much fun.

Going to counseling this week at the last minute when he had a cancelation and offered it to me.  Thanks to my in-laws (who were able to come watch Carly) I was able to scoop up that opening and go see him. (Josh's parents' house sold & closed, so they were finally able to move here, and we are so, so glad they are here for good!!!)

It was a much needed session as we discussed some parenting issues I've been having (self esteem and lying issues with the twins- heading into middle school years is going to be HARD on my mama heart!) as well as what I want to do now instead of emotional eating & book buying, both of which I want to give up in the new year.

Planning to clean/organize, workout or journal when I feel like emotional eating or book buying.  So far, this has actually been working, which is fantastic.

Kon Mari'ing my entire house in preparation for Wyatt's surgery to remove his tonsils & adenoids next week (the 18th).  I have taken that nervous "I'm-not-in-control" energy and siphoned it into something extremely useful. I am slowly watching all the episodes of Tidying Up on Netflix (after having read The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up two years ago when we first moved here) and have been slowly but surely tackling areas of my life again since the new year.  It keeps me busy when my anxious feelings pop up about Wyatt's surgery (the idea of him being put under for surgery with his history of asthma makes me so worried!) and is really productive.  If you haven't checked out the show on Netflix, I highly recommend it. There are only 8 episodes, and it's a very gentle, achievable type of clean/organized. When they are done, the houses are NOT perfect. They are real and livable, and I like that.

Feeling like a failure as a wife & mother in the early part of this week.  I haven't been working out this week, plus it's my time of the month, so I know that is contributing to my feeling this way, but the feelings are real, nonetheless, and it sucks.  I just feel like I am letting everyone around me down, and it is really heavy. Parenting the older two has been really emotionally hard as of late, (hormones and morals and tempers and lack of fully developed frontal lobes...) while preparing Wyatt for his surgery hasn't been easy either ("Do you ever not wake up from being put under?" "How do they take my tonsils out?" "What will it look like?") and while Carly was a breeze at two, she seems prepared to make three a bit of a challenge for me ("I said I wanted to do it myself." "Jack is being a butthole." "Why did you say no to me?!?") sigh.  I feel pulled in a hundred different directions, and all I want is some time to myself, which feels ridiculously selfish when they all need so much from me.  It's been hard.

Taking Wyatt to the movies as a reward for good behavior, and enjoying the rare one on one time.  He chose to watch Bumblebee which was a super cute movie, and we enjoyed the snacks & time alone.

Looking forward to doing the hardwood floors in the rest of our house and redoing our bathroom.  After doing the main bathroom (which looks amazing and still takes my breath away every time I walk in it!) I am really on pins & needles to start our master bath & put those gorgeous floors throughout the house!

Reading As Bright As Heaven and finishing it.  It was such a sweet story (despite being about the Spanish flu in Philadelphia), and one that kept me turning pages despite the hectic first week we had back in our routine.  This week I also listened to Off The Clock on audio.  Off The Clock was an interesting read.  The author suggests you measure your time (preferably in half hour increments) to literally see where your time is going. This is something I may do at some point in the future, especially if I want to increase the amount of time I spend reading. I would also like to better track how much sleep I get/need.

Her other advice is to do something memorable everyday (which I love!), and to lower expectations (for example, instead of saying, "I'll do a 45 minute workout everyday", say "I will work out everyday".  That way, even if it is 10 minutes, it counts, and you are more likely to try and squeeze one in at all.)

Starting Troublemaker by Leah Remini and How To Walk Away by Katherine Center.  Troublemaker I listened to on audio.  It was read by the author, which I really enjoyed, and was such a fascinating story of Leah's childhood, experience in scientology and insider's look at life near Tom Cruise and inside her church.  Her story of leaving her church, a place once warm & familiar, really resonated with me, because I also had to leave my church once upon a time, and it is not an easy thing to do, no matter the reason.  Her heartbreak, the way she lost friends & loved ones because of it, gave me such compassion for my 18 year old self that before hearing her story I hadn't been capable of giving. I felt TERRIBLE for Leah, and in doing so, was able to feel the same way for myself.  Sad for the choices I had to make and the things I had to leave behind. Sad for the memories that leaving tarnished. It was a book that really left a mark on me. I am so glad I read it.

How To Walk Away is the book I chose for our local book club this month, and I am so happy with my choice!  It was a very sweet book about a girl who is in a plane crash and the story follows her recovery.  I felt like the story was very inspirational, even though Margaret isn't always feeling like she will come out alright, and I underlined a lot of lines.

My favorite:

"They couldn't possibly get it.  Some kinds of wisdom can only be earned... The greater our capacity for sorrow becomes, the greater our capacity for joy.  So I went on, "That's the thing you don't know- that you can't know until life has genuinely beaten the crap out of you: I am better for it all.  I am better for being broken."

***

I feel like this quote goes perfectly with what Margaret was saying in How To Walk Away.

It's the hard things we face that build us into who we become.

And after you've been through them,

you'd rarely wish them away.

Because they are what make you so strong.

*

Around Here: Week 35 {2018}

Playing... at what Carly calls the "car park" because we take the car there instead of walking. (haha)  There is a sand box and lots of cool workout equipment that the kids like to try.  They had fun and I got to sit and journal, which was just what my mama heart needed the weekend before school started.

Making... Josh's salads everyday for his lunch at work.  We fill them with all sorts of goodness- spinach, cucumbers, peppers, cheese, ham, broccoli, mushrooms,  peppercinis, and tomatoes (from the garden!).

Watching... the smoke from wildfires in our state come and go throughout the days leading up to the first day of school.  Thankfully it has finally dissipated.  We're all so grateful to be able to go outside and to be breathing easy again.
We've also been watching lots of construction vehicles as our road was resurfaced this last week.  The kids, especially Wyatt, loved seeing all the big rigs and special equipment.

Spending... date night alone as Josh was out of town helping his brother lay flooring at his parent's house in preparation for their house being listed so they can move here (!!!).  I made myself a hawaiian pizza (that was delicious, if I do say so myself!) and watched Tully, which I have wanted to see since it was in the theater.  It was different than I thought it would be, but I was spellbound throughout the entire movie. I loved it. I highly recommend it. It was so validating as a mother.  What we do is HARD.

Enjoying... movie night with the kids Saturday with homemade pizza and cookies in a cup.  (If you haven't tried it, I highly recommend you do. It's super simple to make, and so yummy!)  The kids are constantly begging for it!  I am not sure if this makes me a good mom or a terrible mom but we rented both Daddy's Home and Daddy's Home 2 this week and watched them.  There's a little swearing, but overall, they're really funny movies and the boys and I laughed our heads off watching them together.  It was a fun way to spend the last few days of summer when we were stuck inside with the smoke.
We've also been enjoying LOTS of Legos with the smoke.  The boys suddenly took a new interest in their Legos again, and I'm so grateful.  Logan especially has been loving them and spent the money his great grandma sent him to buy a set of new Ninjago guys. The twins so rarely participate in quiet activities that I love when they play Legos.

Improving... my book numbers for August.  Last week I had read ONE BOOK in August. Pitiful!  This week I finished No One Cares About Crazy People, In Shock, and I am making progress on To All The Boys I've Loved Before and I started After Anna on audio.  I am hoping September will be more fruitful than August both because the kids are back in school and because Josh shouldn't be out of town as much.

Liking... Logan's new ID bracelet.  I had gotten him (and his brothers) Road ID bracelets because they're trendier and kind of cool, but twice now Logan has lost the metal part that has his name & our phone numbers on it (which is kind of the whole point!!!), so I went old school and ordered him the kind I had growing up.  He loves it and I have much more peace of mind knowing he won't lose it, especially considering his epilepsy & recent seizure activity.

Skating... at the skate park the day before school started at Wyatt's request.  All four kids ended up having a fantastic time and we were there for over an hour.  They rode scooters, skateboards and ripsticks.  Carly played mostly by just sliding down on her bottom.  She was filthy when we were done, but she had so much fun!

Potty training... Carly against my own will.  She has started telling me, "I need to potty train" meaning she needs to pee, and then asking me to take off her diaper. It started last week, as I mentioned and has continued this week, so I have her in panties whenever we're home and we're just seeing how it goes!  She lives for candy, so the m&m's are giving her life, and she loves to go on the potty.  She poops on the potty no problem, and prefers the big toilet to her potty chair (which is great for me, because #lesscleaning!)  I wasn't quite ready for this step yet, but she's self motivated, so I am rolling with it.

Attending... back to school night with all four kids on my own because Josh had his school's back to school night the same night.  Luckily the twins just played on the playground and Carly was really well behaved.  I'm pretty sure she thought she was getting ready to start second grade, too.  She sat in the chair next to Wyatt and pretended.  Wyatt's teacher is amazing (she just had a baby 12 days ago!) and her long-term substitute is also amazing, so I have a feeling it's going to be an awesome year.  His sub has asthma herself, so she was very understanding about his health situation and I think we're going to have really good communication when he's absent which gives me hope for when/if he gets sick.

Starting... school Wednesday.  All in all, I would say the first day was a success.  We made it through the morning routine, got to school with plenty of time to play at early-morning recess, and were all smiles at drop off.  Wyatt barely even looked at me as he ran off to class.  Each day since has been the same.
Last year he required elaborate hugs and songs and dances and silly goodbye rituals so he wouldn't cry, and this year, I have to remind him to turn around and wave. Hah!  I am so grateful!!!  Thursday night as I tucked him into bed he said, "I can't wait to go to school tomorrow!" and Wednesday when I picked him up from his first day he said, "I think I have the best teacher at my school!" I am just so happy for him!
The twins had their first experience riding on a bus (they ride from our home school to another campus for some of their time, just a short five minute ride there and back) and they can't get over how you don't have to wear a seatbelt.  They seriously won't stop talking about it.

Getting... Logan's first seizure at school over with.  Around noon on the second day I got a text from the teaching app his teacher uses letting me know he had had a two minute seizure, had done amazing and was doing okay afterward.  I felt immediately very sad (for both Logan and myself) and powerless.  I hated the feeling of not being there.  I desperately wanted to hug & comfort him.  But I was also really grateful, because it sounded like they (and Logan) had handled it beautifully.
The whole day Thursday I had had a feeling one was coming and had even warned Jack before they rode to school (they leave a little ahead of me) "Stick real close to Logan.  It's been a week since his last seizure and he's due."  Sure enough, Thursday was the day.
Monday, on the advice of a friend, I had called the neurologist and sent her the video of the six minute seizure.  She had suggested a dose increase (from 150 to 200mg 2x a day of Lamictal) so Tuesday he started that.  It will take a few days for that change to really be in effect though.  He's doing the increase only at night for the first week, then he will take it in the morning as well.
My mom asked me if I was hopeful and I, being brutally honest, told her no. I'm not.  I feel now, after one failed dose increase already, and worsened seizure activity, that Lamictal is not the medication for Logan.  That said, I am totally okay with being proven wrong.  I think I am just tired of getting my hopes up, only to have them shot down again.  It's exhausting.
I guess time will tell.

Walking... the boys to school everyday, which is an awesome workout. (Back & forth twice is about three miles.)  The kids love riding their bikes or scooters and I love that the exercise is built into our days.  I think my workout routine this past week is the only thing that has gotten me through the stress of all the changes that have come with the start of school- teacher meeting, supply gathering, routine starting, etc.

Drinking... smoothies every morning for breakfast.  In them I put, 1 banana, half an apple, 5 ice cubes, 1 cup water, 3/4 cup spinach, 4 strawberries & 1/2 cup frozen berry medley.  They're super yummy and so much healthier than the honey toast and coffee with (massive amounts of) creamer I used to have. ;)

Weighing... a pound less this week!  I'm down to 168lbs which is a new low for me and I'm so pumped! I am down 32 pounds since January and am feeling so darn proud of myself.  I feel like I have really learned how to handle my stress in a productive and healthy way (exercising, journaling and going to therapy) and you can see it in my life.
The lowest I've been since having children was 158lbs when Wyatt was really sick as a one year old with Hand, Foot & Mouth and I spent 48 hours nursing him pretty much constantly.  So my goal is 158lbs right now.  I can hardly believe it's only ten pounds away!!!

Buying... a new washer & dryer set.  When I discovered our washer was leaking again, Josh said not to call the insurance people again (we have a home warranty on our appliances) because he was not interested in waiting six weeks for another part, just to have something else break next month.  Our washer is at least fifteen years old and it was just time to bite the bullet and buy something new.
Well, it was lucky timing, it turns out, for our washer to break so close to Labor Day because Lowe's was having a 40% off sale, and we saved $600 on our set!!!
We were able to bring home the washer on Thursday night, and the dryer should be available sometime next week, which is fine as our old dryer is still working.  I have never been so happy to do laundry as I have been the last two days.  The new washing machine is amazing.  We got a top loader without an agitator and I swear I could wash an elephants entire wardrobe! It's amazing! I love it!!!

Basking... in my role as a homemaker.  As most of you know, I was able to quit my job as an online tutor back in June.  (I used to work for VIPkid teaching Chinese students how to speak English) It was a great gig while it lasted, but the hours were brutal (I had to wake up at 3:30am to teach) and it took a lot out of me.  I feel like since quitting, I have slowly been reclaiming "me" and it feels so good.  I am more patient, kind and loving.  And I am really digging into making our house a home again, and am slowly making a list of what things I'd like to improve around here, (mostly organizationally) now that the kids are back in school.  Since I spent the summer taking care of myself (working out and getting my mental health back on track) a lot of my house went to crap.  And that's okay, but it feels really good to be taking care of the house again as well.

Laughing... at the twins trying out the stilts they built with Josh after I told them that we had stilts growing up.  They are hilarious and determined on them and I'm so proud!  My sister said we officially have a circus now.  Ha!!!

Loving... Wyatt's experiment he saw at school and tried out at home with a toilet paper roll.  He took a toilet paper roll, then stacked five super heavy books on top of it, and the toilet paper roll, magically, did not crumble under the weight.  He said it didn't collapse because of its shape.

Remembering... that parenting is hard sometimes and grace can go a long way.  I won't go into a lot of detail here, but parenting the twins has been extra hard this week and those two can go from "best of friends" to "oil and water" in the blink of an eye.  Josh and I are often finding ourselves completely worn out from attempting to problem solve and keep the peace between them.  Their twinship creates a unique challenge that we are attempting to navigate, but boy! It's tough!  We often feel we are making it up as we go along and just crossing our fingers that we aren't screwing them up in the process!!!  As quick as they can go from calm to angry, I can go from "They need to be punished!" to "They just need a hug!" After a quick prayer sent to the man upstairs this morning, though, I decided that I am going to try and give a little extra grace throughout this next week as these big boys of ours adjust to this big transition of taking classes on the middle school campus, having new teachers, new friends and adjusting to summer (and all their beloved screen time) being over. Haha!  I seriously thought today, "Maybe they're just detoxing from screen time," and then images from shows I've watched on A&E flashed through my mind. (dramatic enough, Shelly?)
Please, friends, tell me I am not alone!

***

Meditating on these quotes as I close this week:

"Remove any of your fear with faith.

Trust the power of God to guide you."

M. Russell Ballard 

*

Praying for the strength to trust God

to guide me as I struggle with parenting 

(& life in general)

Praying the same for you, too!

***