Showing posts with label hair loss. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hair loss. Show all posts

4.14.2019

Week 15 Around Here {2019}























Loving... how God gives me hugs in the form of sunrises and sunsets.  This week it was the most spectacular sunrise that had our sky turning pink & purple and looking more like a watercolor and less like real life.  It was stunning, and took my breath away.

Squeezing... the last bit of fun out of Spring Break by renting Bumblebee for the kids for movie night and letting Wyatt have his friend over for pizza & cookies with us, and having my sister and her crew come over for the day Sunday.  The kids had fun together and I fell even more in love with my little niece.  She came over to me with her lovey blanket and cuddled in my lap on the couch and I seriously MELTED.  Oh how I love that little lady!

Preparing... for the week ahead by cleaning house with the kids Sunday evening and grocery shopping with Carly on Monday.

Struggling... to get back in the swing of things after Spring Break despite my preparation & good intentions.  We got out of our routine (read: had fun) over spring break and getting back on schedule (read: going to bed on time) was really hard all.week.long!  This struggle lead to some really rough mornings.  My tiredness coupled with the rain and some serious tween attitudes forced me to take some really deep breaths.  There were SO many fights to break up that one morning they found themselves grounded for the day because of their behavior.

Choosing... eye glasses for Carly who saw the eye doctor for the first time this week and is far sighted with a severe astigmatism, just like her three brothers before her.  Her prescription is not quite as strong as Logan's, which is a +5. something, but stronger than Jack's, falling at +3.5 Rx.  She looks ridiculously cute in her glasses.  I can't wait for them to get in with her lenses ready.
They had to dilate her eyes pretty severely so her pupils were huge for two whole days, and I joked that if she had asked for a unicorn I'd have gone out looking for one. Thankfully I had found a pair of tiny pink sunglasses on sale at Walmart earlier this week.  She put them to good use those two days.
Even though all three of our boys have bad vision, I don't think I had prepared myself for the idea that she would need glasses.  I was a bit in denial that we produce children with bad vision, I guess.  Luckily she's excited to match the brothers and I think she'll be adorable in them.
We also chose new glasses for Logan & Jack after their annual eye appointments this week.  I am so grateful for our awesome local eye doctor's office- the doctor and everyone on his staff is so great.  They fix the boys' glasses when they break, help us choose good glasses that tend to come with the best warrantees (because they know they will be seeing us soon with broken glasses in hand) and are so kind & engaged with my kids.

Reading... The Life You Longed For, which was slow to start, but then really good (& interesting- about Munchausen by proxy, so creepy!) and also Queenie, which I still haven't gotten totally into.  Meh.
I also listened to the rest of My Year of Rest and Relaxation, which was bizarre, but totally entertaining, and Lousiana's Way Home, which is a middle-grade read by Kate DiCamillo and is a sweet, short read.
Receiving my Book of the Month order, containing three books I can't wait to read!  This month I ordered Normal People by Sally Rooney, Miracle Creek by Angie Kim and Lost and Wanted by Nell Freudenberger.  If I can't get myself into Queenie, I may just jump into one of these next!

Thankful... that when Wyatt gets sick it doesn't produce in me the same anxiety that it used to.  We know so much more now, and we have the right mix of meds to keep him out of the hospital and off of oral steroids, both of which feel like miracles.  Every time he gets sick, I never cease to be grateful that the nebulizer does what it's supposed to (we use albuterol & budesonide in it 2x daily when he's sick) and it keeps us from having to be seen and keeps him from getting worse.  Hearing him cough doesn't send me off into a panic like it used to.  I never imagined that could happen.  What a blessing.

Smiling... about my new haircut.  It's been six months since I started Monat, and about eight months since most of my hair fell out, following a really stressful period of parenting Wyatt through a bout of bad asthma and Logan through a period of severe seizures that were uncontrolled by medication. I am taking some strong vitamins as well as biotin, plus using Monat shampoo (Black & Renew) and conditioner (Revitalize) everyday as well as their Replenish hair mask weekly, Rejuvenique hair oil twice a month, and Intense Repair Treatment & Rejuvabeads Split End Mender daily.  At first it felt like a lot, but my girl Haverlee assured me that in the end it would all be worth it. And thus far, she's been right.
I've been keeping it shorter since it started falling out, and this most recent haircut has me actually feeling like it's getting better.  I am so excited!  It's so true that you don't know what you got till it's gone.  I totally took my "good" hair for granted.  I actually envy Carly's messy bun. Hah!  But hopefully not for long.

Rolling... right into baseball season with practice every day of the week for either the twins or Wyatt's team.  It's crazy, but it's also kind of our favorite.  Plus it has meant Uncle Samuel is around more because he is helping Josh coach the twins' team, and that is everyone's favorite.  He makes us smile more and laugh harder.  Carly is especially in love with him.  He always says yes to reading a story or a playing a game with her, and it makes her so happy.  It's the most precious little relationship, watching her light up when he gets here.

Confirming... with our amazing orthodontist that Wyatt does need a spacer for his tiny little palate/nasal area.  It turns out he has a deviated septum, which makes it very hard to be a nose breather, which is what everyone should be.  If we can put a spacer in his mouth, spreading his palate a little wider, it will also give his nose a little more "room to breathe" (pun intended) and will allow him to breathe through his nose despite his deviated septum.

Impressed... by Carly's ability to draw things.  A few weeks ago she started drawing faces, and now her faces have legs and arms and sometimes hair.  Then earlier this week she drew a whale.  She's only three and I'm kind of blown away by her talent.

Momming... so hard this week.  You guys.  Sometimes I think that maybe we shouldn't be the ones who decide how many kids we have.  Like, when I had Carly, parenting the other three was relatively easy.  But now? Now that hormones are involved? Oh sweet baby Jesus, hold me.
I am parenting so hard that most days I can barely get into my pajamas at bedtime.  I forget things, I am constantly running late, I resolve to be patient, lose my temper, resolve to be patient again.  Lose my temper. Again. Sigh.
We are working with the kids on problem solving with our words instead of our bodies (there is seriously so.much.fighting with three brothers born within three years); teaching how to wash our bodies completely in the shower now that none of the boys are bathed by mom or dad; and how to choose the right friends to hang around. (Why is being "cool" so cool?)
They never stop moving, never sleep, never shut up.  (For reals. Is there even that much to talk about? There can't be. And yet.) They wake me up at least twice a night for nightmares, anxiety or imaginary ailments.  I am always so flipping tired.
But also, being with them, hearing their thoughts at bedtime as I tuck them in, rubbing their backs as I sing them a song from JJ Heller's lullaby album, it's like my church.  They are my devil and my redeemer.  They are my savior and what I need rescuing from.  Children's books read out loud in their beds, piled high with blankets & stuffed animals, followed by hugs, kisses and snuggles? That's my church.  I wouldn't trade it for anything.  But some weeks, I'll tell you, I am putting in the WORK. And this was one of those weeks.

And since... laughter is good medicine, here's something funny I read this week about mom sleep.  "It's like regular sleep, but without the sleep." 
It's funny cause it's true.
#dying

Heartwarmed... when I went to plug in the twins' cell phones and found they both had Carly's picture as their lock screens.  They may fight with each other, and drive me CRAZY, but they are amazing big brothers, and they love her like nothing in this world.  She's so lucky to have them.

***

Next week, I am going to try to get on top of my self care.
  • 1) Go to bed on time
  • 2) Wake up before the kids
  • 3) Working out in some fashion everyday
  • 4) Take time to read 
  • 5)  Journal something each night



***

1.11.2019

Week 1 Around Here {2019}











Hahah! #truth

New hair growth mohawk

Josh & his baby sister Margaret
Top Nine Reads of 2018



Our new bathroom!
Unexpected Good Reads



Reading... As Bright As Heaven, which I got from Book of the Month, and Girl, Wash Your Face which I bought myself for my birthday with money I got from my grandma back in November.  As Bright as Heaven is about the Spanish Flu in Philadelphia, and is such a good book!  I really like it.  And Girl, Wash Your Face is a very inspiring, "pump-you-up" read.  I am doing a chapter a day, and it's keeping me very motivated to work on my goals for the new year. Love it!

Meditating... daily using the "Calm" app on my iphone.  It costs (I think I paid around $40 for a yearly subscription) but it is so worth it. I use it when I am having a panic attack, or when I need to fall asleep and my mind is racing. One of my goals this year is to meditate everyday (even if it's just two minutes) so having access to this app is really helpful.  I'm currently doing "21 Days of Calm" which is a different meditation each day, along with helpful advice about how to better stay on top of your emotions. I am loving it.

Sharing... my top 9 books of 2018 on social media, and also sharing my most unexpected good reads of 2018.  I would love to know in the comments what your favorite or most unexpected reads of 2018 were! (follow me on Instagram for more book posts!)

Ecstatic... over Josh and my brother-in-law finishing the main bathroom remodel.  Those two are machines, and I cannot get over how amazing the bathroom looks. It's truly unbelievable. It's also unbelievable that they accomplished what they did in less than two weeks.

Relishing... every minute of a nap Carly spent in my arms.  I can't remember the last time she slept in my arms, so rocking her in her in the rocking chair as she slept while the boys were off with Josh one afternoon felt like a dream come true.  Oh, my sweet baby. sigh.

Enjoying... a Christmas visit from my parents.  They came bearing gifts (holy adored grandchildren!!!) and we had so much fun together!  We went out to eat, went swimming at their hotel, and then bathed Carly in their room since she hadn't had a bath in quite some time with the bathroom remodel happening at our house!  The next day they came over and we played Headbanz, or at least we tried to.  Carly looks at what is on your card, tells you what it is, "Bacon!" and then yells, "You win!" Hahah! After that, they took us all out to eat and then took the boys ice skating!

Loving... the pictures that Julie sent me of Josh and his baby sister Margaret. I always think that Carly looks just like me when I was little (and she does in some pictures) but goodness sakes! Looking at these pictures of Josh as a toddler made me realize that Carly looks a lot like her daddy as well!

Relaxing... for an entire day when Josh took the boys out to his parents land to ride their four wheelers (they got four wheelers for Christmas from Santa!) and I got to spend the day at home with Carly.  I took a bath in our new tub, cleaned the house, read my book, and just enjoyed the peace & quiet.  It was so, so lovely.

Organizing... my "To Read" shelf in the living room and discovering I have 100 books I haven't read.  I couldn't believe I had 100 exactly!  From there, I set a goal of reading 1 book per week this year, so my (conservative) goal is to read 52 books.  But here's the catch- I can't buy any more books this year (barring any from Book of the Month. I am going to allow myself to continue that monthly subscription) so those 52 have to come from my shelves or my library app on my phone (where I listen to audio books).  I hope to surpass that goal, but I also want to enjoy reading, not feel pressure to just fly through books.  I definitely felt that at times last year.  What is your goal this year? Do you have a # in mind?

Growing... my hair back after it all fell out in September after the stress of caring for Wyatt in the spring.  I got on some strong vitamins in October and also started using Monat and am definitely seeing strong growth, but it means that 90% of the time, it looks like I have a tiny mohawk. Ugh. Not cool.  But I know that in another month or two, that will improve (the same thing always happened to me when I had babies) and my hair will be thick again someday.
Using the Monat does take some time- I have to wash my hair twice everyday in the shower, but I can feel the difference in how clean & strong it is.  I also put in the oil treatment overnight once a week, and use lots of product after my shower before I blow dry, but I am really trusting Haverlee that it will all be worth it when my hair fully grows in and is even healthier than before.  I seriously cannot wait.
Between my suddenly terrible adult acne and my ridiculously thin hair, I feel so self conscious these days.

***



I love this quote.
Here's to "the hardships that became our teachers"... 
Yes, yes, yes.

So glad for a new year,
and a fresh start!

*


9.21.2018

Around Here: Week 38 {2018}





















Shocked... to find out that Josh has shingles and Bell's Palsy.  It started with some pain in his scalp during a haircut, then a bit of inner ear pain.  Then last Thursday he woke up and the right side of his tongue was numb and couldn't taste food.  Then Saturday morning he woke up in Vancouver (where he had traveled to help his brother, who is moving to our town) and the entire right side of his face was drooping.  I encouraged him to call the advice nurse and she said he needed to get into the ER.  In the ER they put all his symptoms together and figured out that he had shingles (the scalp & ear pain) that lead to Bell's Palsy (the tongue numbness & face drooping).  Basically the entire right side of his face is paralyzed.
Since then, his eye is now unable to close and he has to put eyedrops in constantly to keep it lubricated.  We also have to tape it shut at night so it doesn't dry out.
He's in a ton of pain from the shingles, and the Bell's Palsy is insanely annoying.  He can't taste his food or blink his eyes or smile normally, and the doctor told him it would be at least three weeks (on the short end) but could take up to six months to completely heal.  Luckily the shingles should heal in about two weeks.
In any event, it's going to be a long road, and my heart just hurts for him.

Coping... with this news by crying hysterically in the shower; going on long walks; talking to friends; eating too much candy; drinking soda (which I haven't had in months); eating comfort food; buying books at Goodwill (my favorite splurge); binging on bad TV at naptime and checking things off my to do list.

Happy... that Josh's brother Samuel moved here permanently.  My kids adore their Uncle Samuel and Josh has been happy having him around as well.

Hanging... with my girl Shana and feeling so grateful for her friendship.

Getting... flowers from our neighbor Barb.  They have brightened my bedroom all week.

Enjoying... muffins from my friend Megan.  Carly is also enjoying them.  And by enjoying, I mean telling me, "I have my own mom. I don't want to share yours." Hah!

Encouraging... a friend (and myself) to find 3 blessings per day to slowly find joy again.  Sometimes (often times) life is hard. So hard.  And just remembering each night as you fall asleep, three little things that made you smile or feel grateful can shift your focus from all that is wrong to all that has gone right.

  • Stacks of books
  • Sister laughs
  • Spontaneous hugs

Walking... to school each day, and enjoying it so much.  The fall weather is simply gorgeous, and I love being out in it.

Going... to the doctor for my recent hair loss.  About two weeks ago, I started noticing I was losing more hair than normal.  It sort of came on my radar. Then this week I really noticed I was losing a LOT of hair.  So much that I would venture to say I've lost more than half of my hair since the beginning of September.  It's so upsetting.
I got myself an appointment earlier this week, assuming it was a delayed side effect from one of my medications (I take Topomax for migraines and Prozac for anxiety), but he said that it's not from either of those (which I've been taking since January & April).  He believes my hair loss is from chronic emotional stress, likely from the super stressful spring we had, when Logan was having an increase in seizures and Wyatt was sick back to back to back.

Not reading... enough this week.

Spending... too much time on social media.  Blah. (Accepting tips & tricks for how to spend less time online.  However, I'll be honest- I'm not willing to give it up entirely! #addicted)

Meditating... everyday this week, which is a step in the right direction for my brain, but hopefully next week I can add more reading and less scrolling to my meditating.  I use the Calm app, and I can't say enough good things about it.

Sleeping... through the night twice this week, and feeling amazing on those days.  I seriously love when I wake up and it's 4 or 5am and I'm like, "What?!? I slept all night?!?" It's the BEST!

Loving... the new couch Josh surprised me with.  It's a beautiful sectional from Costco and fits our whole family, and with room to spare.  The kids have all thanked Josh profusely for it, it's so cute!  The cats are big fans (obviously!) and it even makes me kind of excited for winter time and snuggling up for movie night with the fam.

Celebrating... Logan going two weeks seizure-free on his new meds.  We switched him after his last appointment from Lamictal to Tegretol (Carbamazepine).  He takes 200mg 2x a day.  So far, it seems to be working wonders.  I am ridiculously grateful and hopeful that it continues to work for him.

Taking... Wyatt to the doctor this morning when he woke up and blew a 225 after blowing 300's all week.  He became sick practically overnight.  What is just a runny nose, no big deal, for everyone else, settles into Wyatt's lungs and causes him severe distress, requiring an extended round of steroids, in addition to a week's worth of albuterol and budesonide treatments in his nebulizer.  It makes me grateful I enjoyed the break that the summer offered from his Reactive Airway Disease and asthma, and also grateful for all the steps we took to prepare for illness this fall (preventive inhalers, buying a new nebulizer, refilling prescriptions, and getting a new kind of nebulizer breathing apparatus called the Pari).
I am hopeful that with all these steps in place, and the fact that we got him on steroids so quickly this time, he will recover fast and be back to his regular, healthy self ASAP.

***