See The Good + 2020 Goals

 For the last few years I have chosen a "word of the year"

and this year I wanted to do the same.

When I sat down to think about what I wanted to focus on in my life, 

especially in parenthood & for overall my mental health,

"See The Good" came to me.  

So my main goal this year is to see the good in everything around me.

When things go wrong, or the kids get sick, I want to find the silver lining.

To bring this goal into fruition daily, I grabbed a tiny lined notebook I had lying around and every night I try to write down as many good things as I can that I noticed that day.  It's been super simple, and very impactful because as I go through my day I find myself searching for what things I will be writing down that evening in my little "See The Good" journal. 

In addition to "See The Good", I have some other goals as well:

• Journal more often
• I'm thinking once a week as my specific goal, kind of as a way to replace counseling which I stopped over summer. 
• Save $100/month for Christmas
• This is a "dream big" goal!
• If I do this, I know it will help us keep Christmas "cash only", which we managed this year, but was way more tight than we wanted it to be.
• I hope to achieve this by selling random items I come across as I organize the house in the new year. 
• Walk
• I know I need to workout to help reduce my stress level and improve my sleep.
• Walking happens to be my preferred method of exercise.
• So far, I have not made this happen (thanks to being sick myself & having sick kids) but hopefully I can start in February.
• Read 100 books
• Last year I made it to 89 and was this.close!
• This year I am planning to read at least 8 books a month, more some months.
• I hope to be reading at least 3 books at a time: one non-fiction, one fiction & one audio.
• I'll be posting more about my related "Unread Shelf Project" goals soon!
• "Center Down"
• This is a phrase Anne Morrow Lindbergh, mother of six, used in this quote that struck me some months ago: “Woman's life today is tending more and more toward the state William James describes so well in the German word, 'Zerrissenheit: torn-to-pieces-hood.' She cannot live perpetually in 'Zerrissenheit.' She will be shattered into a thousand pieces. On the contrary, she must consciously encourage those pursuits which oppose the centrifugal forces of today…. Solitude, says the moon shell. Center-down, say the Quaker saints." This idea of surviving the insanity of all the chaos around me by "centering down", finding peace within, and being the "eye of the storm" has been very useful as my home has grown more busy with each passing year. 
• I like this quote from Michael Singer's Untethered Soul as well: "The truth is, everything will be okay as soon as you are okay with everything."  
• I am going to try and make sure that throughout each day I am taking time to breathe and center myself because I know that much of our family's happiness revolves around my ability to keep my cool. (So much pressure!)

*

What are your goals for 2020? Do you have a word for the year?

I'd love to hear all about it!

Around Here: Week 48

{November 24-December 1st}

Bowling... with my parents when they came to town after spending Thanksgiving with them at my sister's house.  The kids had so much fun and so did all the adults. Who knew bowling could entertain all the age brackets!  Thank you, Nanny & Papa!

Dancing... with Carly who is seriously loving music more everyday.  She loves to listen, sing and dance.  It's precious.

Celebrating... Carly turning 22 months old on the 24th.  I can't believe that in two short months she will be an official toddler.  No more baby. Wahhhhh!

Purchasing... a new Christmas rug at Big Lots for only $10.  It makes me ridiculously happy for that price.

Making... our marriage a priority with a little game night and big plans for date night. We love Rummikub and it's just what we needed to reconnect and remember to laugh together, not just survive the chaos.

Watching... Jack struggle with anxiety about his body and the health of his siblings.  I ended up reaching out to his school counselor because honestly, I struggle with the same thing and don't think I'm the best person to walk him through those emotions. His counselor is amazing and she said actually because of my experience I could be a great resource for him.  Together we came up with some things we agree he needs in his "toolbox".  Since then, I've been trying to catch Jack worrying and walk him through how he can better handle his feelings of concern. I'm hoping to do a more in depth post on this soon.

Laughing... at Carly's new cheese face!  It's so terrible, I love it.

Dealing... with four sick kids, on rotation.  I had one kid or another home sick every day this week except Friday.  Wyatt's sickness started the week before Thanksgiving, and we wrapped up this week with each twin coming down with it, and slowly recovering.  I am so over runny noses & coughing!

Relishing... the way Carly says, "I love you" ("I lou you") as we tuck her in each night.  It melts my heart.

Seeing... the doctor Thursday with Wyatt to make sure I was treating his cough the best way possible.  He had been sick, then well, then sick again, so I was worried.  The doctor told me a better way to do his nebulizer treatments and that his lungs sounded clear.  He just needed time to heal.

Canceling... date night and instead visitng the ER on Friday night. (Ironically the Red Box movie we rented but never watched was The Big Sick. Ha!)  Wyatt got out of school Friday and was coughing pretty good.  Honestly, the cough never stopped. He coughed for six hours, unable to fall asleep at bedtime because of it, when I finally said enough was enough and took him to the ER.  They diagnosed him with Reactive Airway Disease (like asthma after a cold, which we've known he had for a long time) and an upper respiratory infection.  He did two intense nebulizer treatments there, but nothing stopped his cough, and they sent us home.  His stats were all acceptable and we figured he just needed time for the virus to be eliminated from his body.  (Turns out, things were about to take a turn for the worse, but more on that in the next weekly update)

Writing... in my Five -Minute Journal every morning before the house wakes up, and every evening before dropping off to sleep.  I can feel it impacting my parenting most of all because each evening it asks how you could make the next day better, and each morning it asks how you can make that day awesome.  It's helping me be very conscious about my choices, my days and how I spend my time.

***

(Posting today, I am one week behind. 

"Around Here: Week 49" should follow shortly)

10 Journal Prompts

Answering these questions sounded fun:

1) 10 Rules I have broken:
I am such a rule follower, I can't think of any rules I've broken.
I guess I've sped in the car before.
And I've definitely gone in the 20 Items or Less Line with more than 20 items.
Seriously, that's all I can think of. Haha! I'm a square.

2) I love the sound of:
Josh making the boys laugh.

3) This morning, when I got out of bed I...
started taking care of my children. It was 4am, and Carly was the one who currently needed me. Then it was the twins, having breakfast. And I made Josh's lunch, and finally I poured Wyatt's cereal. Everyday begins with taking care of others.

4) What scares me the most...
is dying before my children are raised.

5) What is the best advice you have ever been given:
Hold them as much as you can in the first four months.
--This advice, given me by Susan, who had five daughters, gave me permission to stop whatever I was doing, or forget my to do list, and hold.that.baby.  I am so grateful to have had it throughout my parenting journey.

6) Things on my bucket list:

• Write a novel.
• Raise happy, successful, kind people.
• Read all.the.books.

7) My favorite memory from when I was a child is...
the day my little brother Dallas was born.  I checked for the suitcase in the dining room by the china hutch and it was gone. I was equal parts excited for a new baby and that I (finally!!!) got to wear the jean skirt mom bought and was making me save. I put it on hastily and ran door to door telling the neighbors our baby was born.

8) Write a letter to the teenage you:
Dear Shelly,
Trust yourself. You work so hard to make everyone around you happy, but remember to make yourself happy too.  And know that adults don't always know what they're doing either. It's okay to make mistakes or be unsure. You don't have to be perfect. You're enough as you are.
Love, Yourself

9) What do you wish for?
I wish for more time. Always more time. Time to read and to write. But also more time to enjoy my children being children. I know that someday I will really miss this crazy time in my life.

10) If you could be a character from a book, who would you be?
I would be Cinderella after the story ends. She has her prince, and is about to start her life in the castle. I'd fill it with children and be merry.

Keep a Food Diary

Success Snapshot 6:

KEEP A FOOD DIARY

Everyday since my journey began I have written down my weight, workout, water intake and food consumption.  I also wrote down any emotions or revelations I had that day in regards to my eating.  It's been good personal accountability and has been great for looking back at how far I've come.

{A typical day for me}

When I started I was pretty in love with my little blank rainbow journal and the beautiful pens my friend Kori sent me when I was still in Alaska.  But YOU GUYS! Then, then (!) I found this journal at Target (when I was shopping with all four of my kids and they were maybe shooting rubberbands at each other on the next aisle over...) and I fell in love. I want everyone to have it.

"No goal was met without a little sweat!"

How adorable is this little gem?

I love everything it stands for!  And the best part? It only cost $14.99 to stay inspired everyday for 120 days!

I took pictures of the inside so you could really catch the magic:

See?!? It's a two page spread that has room for gratitude keeping, goal setting, body loving & food journaling. Plus it has a daily quote to inspire you!!!  I am so pumped for this 60 day challenge to end, and our next Friends (the tv show) themed 21 Day Challenge to start so I can switch to my new Fit Journal! (link is for something similar on Amazon since Target doesn't carry the item online)

***

My food journal is also where I keep track of non-scale victories (NSV) and write down my goals.  It's really important to write those down and to celebrate each NSV you reach because that will propel you forward.  For me fitting into my 14's again, and putting my wedding ring back on were huge NSV's that made me feel incredible.

And when it comes to eating right and changing bad eating habits (especially for us emotional eaters) reflection is key!  So run to Target & pick up your new Fit Journal.  And if you're at all curious about  joining our next challenge, which starts Monday June 13th, please let me know!

My email: rcunningham18@hotmail.com

My Journal

I love writing in my journal.  With such easy access to Facebook, Instagram and my blog, it's easy to neglect that sweet little book on my bedside table, but whenever I take a moment to write, like this afternoon while the boys played in the sun, I feel better.  I love to get things off my chest, clear my thoughts & remember certain times in my life.

One of my favorite past times is rereading old journals.  I have nearly 100 (starting when I was 8 years old) and love being able to skim them and jump back into any point in my life.

"Writing is seeing. 

It is paying attention."

-Kate DiCamillo

***