When my anxiety was at its height, I would lay in bed at night, obsessing over the rights and wrongs of my day. The mistakes I had made, opportunities missed, avenues not explored. Basically, along with anxiety, I was suffering from Mom Guilt... The worst case I'd seen in my five years as a practicing mother.
In response to this, I started making a list of the things I did right. Every day (sometimes only an hour into the day) I can make a nasty laundry list of things I do wrong. But focusing on that only pushes me into a downward spiral. Recording what I do right is harder (it's more difficult to find the good when you're feeling bad), but focusing on the positives has helped me cultivate goodness and got me where I am today with FIVE successful No-Yelling days (in-a-row!) behind me.
1. When Wyatt asks me to rock him a little bit more, I do.
2. When Wyatt asks me sing another song, I do.
3. When Wyatt asks me to read to him, one more time, I do.
4. Every morning I get up with the boys
5. Every day we give the boys vitamins
6. Every day we make sure they brush their teeth.
7. I cut their nails.
8. I cut their hair.
9. I lotion their bodies.
10. Every night I read the boys bedtime stories.
11. Every night I tuck them in with hugs & kisses.
12. Every night I pray with them, inspiring gratitude.
13. Every day I feed them two healthy snacks, a delicious lunch & a nutritious dinner.
14. I let them help me bake.
15. I do "One Fun Thing" everyday.
16. I am trying to be a better parent.
17. We do fun crafts.
18. I homeschool.
19. I provide them with lots of books.
20. And lots of toys.
21. I take them outside whenever I can.
22. I make sure they get to Saturday Social.
23. We revisit our fun summer memories together.
24. I keep the house clean so they can be healthy.
25. I take care of them so they can be safe.
26. I feed them well so they can grow.
27. I hug them daily so they can feel loved.
28. Their father and I put our marriage first so they don't have to worry.
29. I am a stay-at-home mommy, which I believe is best for them.
30. Their dad works hard to provide for our family & better himself.
31. Their father is an educated man.
32. I am an educated woman.
33. I limit their screen time.
34. They always have clean clothes to wear.
35. I decorate the house happily for every holiday.
36. I take care to acknowledge their differences.
37. I don't let them watch inappropriate shows or movies.
38. I don't let them listen to inappropriate music.
39. I keep their glasses clean.
40. I give them "fun" baths.
41. When I make a mistake, I apologize.
42. I hug them through their emotions.
43. I take pictures, recording the magic of their childhood.
44. I encourage their creativity.
45. I read out loud to them everyday. Multiple times a day.
46. I teach them kindness.
47. I gave them the gift of siblings.
48. I let them make messes.
49. I teach them how to clean up those messes.
50. I encourage responsibility.
I hesitated to post this because it sounds like I'm tooting my own horn. Let me assure you, I could make a list three times as long, of all the times I've overreacted, screwed up & let myself (and my kids) down. But losing my temper, becoming frustrated, & lacking perfection does not make me a bad mom.
There will be hard days.
That's okay.
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1 comment:
I love this post! It is so good to remember you are a great mom and the boys are so lucky to have you as their mom and staying home and teaching them every day. Congratualtions on 5 straight days of no yelling, that is amazing!
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