27 Tips for Surviving Anxiety

The last few weeks, since getting well from pneumonia in December, I have been uber focused on getting well mentally.  This has included a variety of methods, so I thought I'd share what has worked for me with you!

 1. Be Optimistic 

It's so important that I believe I can be well.  Holding onto that hope has been a struggle at times, but it's so worth the fight!

2. Be in the Moment 

If you are struggling with anxiety, staying out of the past and out of the future is really important.  Being where you are with what you're doing can get you through anything.

3. Read this Book

Hope and Help for Your Nerves by Dr. Claire Weekes

4. Go to this Website

www.anxietycoach.com

5. Accept the Anxiety

Take the advice of the book & the website, and accept the anxiety, knowing it will eventually pass.  The more you resist the feelings, the stronger they get.  Relax into the sensations, and don't fight them.

6. Reach Out

Phone calls, text messages and time spent with friends is really important.  Anxiety can be very isolating, so seeking out support has been vital to me.  Sharing my struggle in person and on the blog has been very therapeutic, as has talking with other people who also deal with panic.

7. Read for Pleasure

Just 6 minutes a day can improve your happiness.  There was a period of time when the anxiety was too severe for me to focus on reading, but once I could, I found it brought me immense joy.

8.  Take Baths

Taking time, usually before bed, to lay and let my thoughts simmer before trying to sleep has been very useful.

9. Indulge Yourself

Every day I listen to my favorite music, put in new Scentsy smell goods, take a long shower, eat a little chocolate, and try to enjoy some kind of quiet time, even if it's only ten minutes before I fall asleep.

Letting myself be the priority in a few different ways each day reminds me that I am a priority, too, not just the kids, my husband and the house.

10. Drink water

And lots of it.

11. Sip Tea

Mentally, drinking tea does a great deal of good for me. It makes me feel warm and comforted, and generally calmer than before I had it.

12. Eat Healthy

When I am able to eat well, my whole body feels better, which leads my mind to feeling better, too.  With my anxiety came a lack of appetite, so it was important that I continue to eat despite my lack of desire to do so.

13.  Get Plenty of Sleep

An early bedtime has been vital for my sanity.  Being sleep deprived makes me less rational, and more emotional.  Getting enough sleep allows me to think before responding, and has let my weary mind get a much needed break.

14. Workout!

Everyday, do a little something to get your heart pumping. This helps deal with the adrenalin that is overreacting inside, causing anxiety.  It also releases endorphins that make you feel happier!  Bonus-- working out also makes you tired and more likely to get a good nights' sleep! Awesome!

15.  Take Your Medication

I am on a daily medication for anxiety & depression, and I also have an as-needed anxiety pill.  I never miss my daily pills, and I work very hard to take my as-needed pill whenever I need it.  Sometimes I try to be the hero and avoid taking it, but this generally doesn't work out real well.

It's also important that you give medication plenty of time to start working, and have open communication with your doctor about what's working and what isn't.

16. Find a Good Counselor

Don't be afraid of finding someone to talk to.  Even if you aren't sure what you will talk about, or what your problem is, a counselor can help. They can help by listening, providing coping mechanisms, and directing you toward a better future.

My first counselor was not the right person for me. His solution was for me to move back to Vancouver, but I am a firm believer in "Wherever you go, there you are", so I felt he was misguided. I talked with my mom, sister and Josh about it, and eventually had to make the decision myself to let him go. You want a counselor who challenges you, yes, but not one who intimidates you or doesn't hear you.

My new counselor has acknowledged the challenges I face, given me new thoughts to ponder, more tools to use, and has lead to Tips #17 & #18.

17. Change Your Thinking

Don't catastrophize, remember "I can do hard things" and challenge old beliefs.

18. A + B = C {work through your emotions!}

A is the Activating Event
B is the Belief you hold about the Activating Event
C is the Emotional Consequence of your Belief

Using this equation, you can challenge your belief that (in my case) being sick (Activating Event) means I should FREAK OUT (Emotional Consequence) because when I sit down and write it out, I realize I only freak out when I'm sick because my Belief was I couldn't go to Anchorage alone. That belief is no longer true, so I am currently retraining my brain to NOT freak out any more when I don't feel well. It's a long road, but I truly believe I can retrain my brain.

19. Journal

My brilliant friend told me that I need anxiety to GET OUT. By whatever means possible. Pray, write a letter, text someone, or journal.  I found that I was scared to journal when I was anxious, but then I did it, and it was amazing. Writing it down was like setting the caged bird free.  The anxiety literally left my body.  I highly recommend it!

20. Use Visualization

My counselor gave me an awesome visualization to use when I am having worries.  He said to close my eyes and imagine it is fall, and I am sitting along the rocks of a slow moving river.  He said to pretend my worries are leaves floating down the river.  Watch as they float past, acknowledging and labeling them (fear of death, worry for illness, financial concerns) and then breathe as I watch them go. He said our anxieties are real, and we can't force them to leave, but this visualization  helps us accept and then let them go.

21. Focus on Your Breathing

In the peak of a panic attack, I find that it's helpful to focus on my breath.  I breathe in through my nose to a count of four, and out through my mouth to a count of four. I breathe out somewhat forcefully to make sure my lungs get completely empty.  Focusing on this, and counting the breaths, allows thoughts to flow freely in and out without concerning me too much.

22. Use Worry Time

On the Anxiety Coach website (see # 4 above) he says that something his patients have found effective is the use of a specific time to stop and worry. When I first read it, I was laughing. But it seeped into my subconscious, and now when I feel a worry coming, I say, "I will worry about that later." And then I do. My worry time is in the shower. I pray, out loud, about every.single.thing I am worried about, and then I get out of the shower feeling a hundred pounds lighter.

23. Trust God

For me, putting my trust back in God (while reading One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp-- thanks again, Kasey!) has been huge in my recovery. Knowing that I'm not in control, but He is, has brought me much needed peace.  Praying everyday, casting my cares upon Him, has allowed me to let go of all the little things and just be.

24. Express Gratitude

When I was so sick, I found that practicing gratitude could really help my perspective. Yes, I was sick, but I had Gatorade! I had my inhaler! At least the kids weren't sick! Finding the silver lining has been a fun challenge throughout this struggle.

25. Fake it Till You Make It

Everyday since I got back from Anchorage I have gotten ready for the day.  I do my hair & make up and wear jeans, not yoga pants.  The idea is that if I look normal & healthy, and move about at a normal & healthy pace, maybe I will start to feel normal and healthy. It's crazy how much it works!

26. Develop & Stick to Routines

Having a daily to do list, regular times of doing things like homeschool, as well as a weekly Date Night & Girls Night help me to have a sense of normal, even when my emotions are out of whack.  Sticking with the schedule, even when you don't feel like it, sort of goes hand in hand with "fake it till you make it"-- if you can just stay with it, it will eventually feel right.

27. Be Flexible

Allow yourself to accomplish things, or let things go, whatever makes you feel good in the moment. Anxiety is all about getting from one moment to the next. So if tackling your to do list puts a smile on your face, then do it. If sitting on the couch watching one more episode of Teen Mom 2 makes you feel better about yourself, then do that.

This is my favorite quote about anxiety:

{Thank you Kari, for sharing it with me}

I find that keeping my anxiety in check requires constant vigilance, but it's all about balance.  Making sure I am taking care of myself as well as those around me.  I hope this list helps some people out there.  I am certainly not using all 27 of these at all times, so feel free to pick and choose what works for you.  Everyone is different. And if there are things not on my list that have worked for you, I would love to hear about them.  

Thank you for letting this be a place where I can talk about my anxiety freely and have such love & support. You guys are the best!