Around Here: Week Six {2018}

Xtra Math time!

Leading... the first week of Happier at Home with The Inspired Readers book club.  It's got me thinking more about my possessions and the role they play in my happiness, as well as how I can better organize them.

Reading... Purple Hibiscus currently.  This week I finished Turtles All The Way Down and Grief Cottage, both of which I enjoyed.  (They both had endings that tied up nicely, which I love!)  I would say I loved Turtles All The Way Down, and enjoyed Grief Cottage.  Up next is The Five Love Languages for my local Book Club. I have heard so much about it, I'm pretty excited to read it.

Celebrating... movie night with my sister & her three kids for a fun change up this weekend.  The boys played outside alllll day Saturday and we got to visit while working through a huge project.  I loved seeing the twins love on Roxanne's baby girl.  When she was fussing while Roxanne was eating, Jack just scooped her up, like an old pro, hushing her and making her happy.  It was such a proud mommy moment.

Organizing... all the hand-me-down clothes I had for Carly! I was so grateful to have my sister's help!  After two years of a terrible system of bins and totes in the shed in the backyard, the sorting got out of control.  Something had to give.  So I perused the organization aisles at Walmart earlier this week and found these see-through bins that look like drawers that zip shut and slide under a bed to use under the twin bed Carly's room so I will no longer have to go to the shed to sort clothes for her.  It's a game changer.  My sister helped me sort through not only the clothes that Carly will grow into, but also what I am saving for her and the boys from their babyhood.  I feel amazing!!!

Cherishing... Wyatt's big heart.  He had himself in tears on Saturday trying to decide between helping me with rolling out tortillas (which I had asked him to do) and going to run errands with Josh (which is what he wanted to do).  I told him to go with his dad, that I'd save him some tortillas to roll.  I know he doesn't get to spend as much time with Josh as he does with me, so I always encourage him to go with Josh on little errands here and there when he can.  He's such a tender little heart, though, that he didn't want to let me down. I just love that sweetheart. Luckily, in the end, he was able to do both.
I am also cherishing Carly's little cherub voice playing all over the house, with all sorts of toys.  She plays Legos, Paw Patrol, guys, or cars, making them talk to each other, expressing sadness, excitement, happiness and hurt.  It's adorable.

Loving... a weekend at home after three weekends of Josh and I either being apart or traveling out of town together. It was nice to just be at home together, with our kids. We grocery shopped, had movie night, enjoyed some down time, and got some stuff on our to-do lists tackled. It was great. 

Increasing... Logan's meds after he had an absent seizure on the trampoline Sunday morning.  He had been jumping on the trampoline with his brothers when they crashed each other (Wyatt & Jack), so they were all sitting, taking a break.  I was outside, too, playing with Carly.  I looked up as Logan was climbing off the trampoline. He was pale and his eyes didn't look right.  He said he'd had one of his headaches.  Then Wyatt & Jack said that Logan had told them, "I'm going to go see my mommy" which isn't how Logan normally talks.  Afterwards, he got really sleepy and laid on the couch, and that night he slept 13 hours.  After a call to the neurologist, we were instructed to increase his dose again, for the second time since October.  Logan took the news really well.  I did not. I am scared that his seizures are changing, and I am scared that we keep having to change his dose.  It's just really overwhelming.  Prayers are welcome that this adjustment to his increase goes as well as the last time.

Having... healthy kids (no more colds or staying home from school) and a sick mama mid-week.  My migraines are finally gone (I have now gone eight days without one.  Hallelujah!), but I injured my stomach (I think pushing Carly in the stroller one handed) which lead me down a rabbit hole of medical googling, which given my hypochondria, was a very, very bad idea and now I am digging my way out of a very serious bout of anxiety, where I wake up with a horrific feeling of dread, paying too much attention to every bodily sensation and hating being alone.  I can't trust my own instincts and don't know what's real and what's not.  I have started reading Phantom Illness, a book about recognizing, understanding and overcoming hypochondria, which I have (honestly) placed all my hope in, but I am still in a very vulnerable, scared place right now and I hate it.  Losing our secondary insurance a week ago didn't help, knowing that any medical care I do require could set us back thousands of dollars (that we don't have) is very real and very scary and I am feeling utterly terrified about all of it.
I also just wish I could talk more openly about my hypochondria without sounding like I am a) crazy or b) exaggerating.  Even though the logical part of my brain knows that my pain is most likely muscular, the hypochondriac part of my brain says, "Yes, but it could be liver failure, therefore, we must research all the symptoms of liver failure and watch for them vigilantly." It's hard to explain.  It's like I know better, but I can't do better.

Enjoying... MOPS (Mothers of PreSchoolers) a local group of moms that gets together here in town twice a month.  I love those ladies so much.  They buoy me up so much in times of trials.  I was so happy to show up there Thursday after spending Tuesday & Wednesday dealing with an injured stomach and sick mind.

Sending... the kids to play outside a TON this week as we have had unseasonably warm weather that we are all loving!  Lots of riding to school, trampoline jumping and bike riding!  Even Carly, who is loving her new pink trike from Nanny & Papa.

Carrying... on with Xtra Math for all three of our boys and loving how it has improved their math skills across the board. Every morning they take turns going into Carly's room (for quiet) and sitting in her rocking chair to work on their math skills on the tablet for ten minutes.

Surprising... Wyatt at school for lunch so Carly could eat with him.  They were so cute together, those two.  We also stayed to play at recess with him, and they had so much fun together.  This is the stuff I always dreamed of when I wanted to be a stay-at-home mom.


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