Lately, the waiting... It's killing me. Do you feel like you go through periods of time that are for a specific purpose. Where the same theme keeps popping up, over and over again? For me, right now, I'm in a period of waiting. Waiting to see what the future holds for our family (more babies? no more babies?)... Waiting to see how my grandpa is (--luckily I finally got word that all is well and he is home! praise the lord!)... Waiting for Josh to get home from work in the evenings... Waiting for math to "click" with the boys... Waiting for afternoon quiet time and a break... Waiting for time to slow down... Waiting for more hours in the day to appear so I can get more done around here...
And more specifically, I've been waiting for THINGS. Three weeks ago I was blow drying my hair after a workout and a shower, and I used the "cool" button (the cute blue one with the snowflake on it? You know?) and the whole thing shook, kind of sparked, and turned bright orange inside. Pretty much scared the bejeezus out of me, and I immediately unplugged it and set it on the counter to cool down before telling Josh it needed to be taken to the dump.
Now I don't know for sure that it would have caught my hair/face/body on fire the next time I used it, but I felt fairly certain that it would, so we threw it out. I had had that blowdryer since before I had the twins, so it was nearing a decade old. As soon as I got downstairs I jumped online and ordered a replacement from Amazon. It said it would be here in two days. I knew that was a lie, considering where I lived, but I thought it'd take a week at most.
Fast forward 21 days of surviving in ALASKA with cold, wet hair every morning, and I finally got my blowdryer yesterday! This morning was like when you get home from camping and get to take a "real" shower, only better, because my hair is not a) in a messy bun and b) bringing my core temperature down.
In addition to waiting for that blowdryer, I am waiting for: the co op to have eggs, coffee creamer and tomatoes; date night tomorrow (We've missed date night for two weeks because the school has been hosting basketball, and bonus, Josh bought the new Hunger Games for us to watch!); Saturday Social for the boys to run crazy (we also missed that for two weeks because of basketball games); and for me to finally feel caught up.
You guys, how do you do what you do? Yes, you. How do you manage to get done all the things you get done in a day living where you live, doing what you do? I am home (literally in.my.house) every single day, barring a few hours on Saturday, and still the laundry piles up, there's toothpaste all over the sinks, and things on the to-do list that taunt me as I re-write them every week, having never crossed them off the week before. I can't imagine how you do it with jobs (did I really used to have one of those? How in the world did I swing it?!?) and after school activities, social engagements, and traffic and shopping and all the demands that are LIVING. Here I am, tucked away in my quiet corner of the world (granted, with three very loud, rambunctious little boys...) but still, here where things move slowly and the demands on my time aside from family are few, and I often feel I am drowning in all the work. I end each day wishing I had read more, laughed more, done more.
I am hopeful that the arrival of my blowdryer (betcha didn't know a blowdryer could signal a change from the heavens?) is a sign that my times of waiting are coming to an end. My hope is that tomorrow Josh will come home from the co op with eggs, creamer and tomatoes (and maybe even lettuce! But let's not go too crazy!), that my weekend won't sneak away from me while I'm not looking, and that I will finally get some of those to-do's crossed off that evil list. I hope my grandpa keeps doing awesome (seriously, I love that guy and am so grateful he's well!) and I hope that as I prioritize and reorganize what my days look like, I will go to bed feeling more content and less demanding.
In the meantime, I know God is just growing my patience.