Around Here: Week 35 2020

{August 23-29th}

Proud... of the twins who are working for my bestie Shana, being the "muscle" as she sorts through her house and garage.  I am so glad they can be helpful to her, and they are so glad to be earning some cash money!! I hope this instills in them a good work ethic and a desire to work hard.  Seeing what it can get you is very inspiring!

Enduring... game after game of "Floor is Lava".  Carly will often call out, "Three... two... one... FLOOR IS LAVA!" and then fling herself up onto the couch or a chair.  I am also constantly finding my couch pillows on the floor (as seen above) used as "stepping stones" to survive the lava floor that is constantly erupting randomly. #momlife

Buying... When Calls the Heart season 7 on accident after hearing from my brother's girlfriend how good it was and then deciding if I have season 7, I need season 6, too.  (Seasons 1-5 are on Netflix!) I plan on re-watching all of them once the boys start school, one episode or two each day during our lunch break, as something to look forward to. I love how wholesome the show is, and often the kids end up watching it with me. 

Experiencing... anxiety when Josh went back to work.  Just knowing that after six months of him home I was going to be on my own with the kids, I was quite overwhelmed.  I know that eventually we will get in a good routine and the anxiety will quell, but for the time being, it sucks. 

Blogging... our weekly Around Here posts to get caught up and feeling good that I'm not too far behind.

Reading... Mindset, The Power of Vulnerability and Men, Women and Worthiness, all on audio this week.  Mindset had an interesting basis, but the book was a bit repetitive. (Basic idea- have a flexible, not fixed, mindset.) The Power of Vulnerability was mind blowing. I think every human on earth should have to listen to it. And Men, Women, and Worthiness was an interesting listen, but not as amazing as The Power of Vulnerability. It's great, cause it's only like two hours, too. 

Catching... up on projects before school starts in two weeks.  It should start September 14th.  The numbers in our area are near 500 per 100,000 and it's recommended they be at 75 per 100,000 in order for schools to open. So I am quite curious how long they will be able to meet in person.  I also wonder if I'll choose to send my kids in person at all this year. (We have a chance to reassess after Christmas break if we'd like to do the hybrid model or send them full time instead of full time distance learning.)

Cleaning... the house and organizing, too, in an effort to get life together and feel like I'm controlling something.  We are deep cleaning and sorting and getting things together to drop at Goodwill.  It feels good to be crossing things off the list, and to have the boys helping while they are still on vacation. 

Having... hard conversations with Josh about work, school and parenting.  We have both been reading Brene Brown audio books and she is impacting us in the best ways.  She calls these conversations "rumbling", and it's quite accurate. You gotta really get to the meat of it, but after you do, it's so, so good. 

Adding... "thankful" to our "best and worst" conversations at the dinner table.  We really want to incorporate gratitude in our daily lives and make sure our kids are as well, so this is our solution to that. Every night we each share the best and worst of our day, and now we are also sharing the thing we were most grateful for.  It's been really sweet to hear what each person is grateful for, and how no one wants to be left out of the conversation or have their turn skipped over. 

Facetiming.... with Wyatt's friend which made him so happy.  They spent nearly the whole time showing each other Matchbox cars, and it certainly wasn't the same as actually playing, but it was something.

Wanting... to share Carly's mama cat and kittens with you.  I ordered this for her maybe a month ago? And I just love it so much.  She loves everything tiny, so I was searching for tiny cats and found it.  The kittens magnetize to the mama's nipples so they look like they're really nursing, and they are all so soft and sweet.  Carly adores them and loves to play with their little magnetic noses. 

Inviting... Alvin to come swim with us one sunny afternoon.  I love how Carly loves him and the boys rough house with him.  It makes me smile.

Mastering... front flips in the pool.  (Well, the kids, not me! Hah! I used to be able to do flips underwater, but now my brain feels too fuzzy afterward.)  And they are working on hand stands and back flips as well.  I love watching them try it. They're so persistent. 

Loving... when I came downstairs and found Logan brushing Carly's hair after a swim.  It was the sweetest.  He was amazed at how tough she is and how many tangles her hair had. #bestbrother

Sending... the kids to Grandma Carol's for the last time this summer and feeling so grateful we had that respite each week.  What a blessing.

Purchasing... bowls from Walmart that bring me ridiculous joy.  They are Pioneer Woman stoneware bowls and were on sale (in store only) for $1.55! They match my colorful Fiestaware plates & bowls and are so convenient for snacks for the kids. 

Thinking... thoughts about my body after listening to half of Jen Hatmaker's book Fierce, Free and Full of Fire.  These quotes really stood out to me:

"I do not apply the impossible rules to anyone but myself."

"You have your body to thank for every little thing that you have experienced."

I so identified with her when she said that the impossible rules she took from society (for example: be thin, but curvy) she applied only to herself. I am exactly the same way. I have so much grace for my friends.  When they screw up parenting or relationships, I am right there to lift them back up, saying, "Everyone makes mistakes. It's okay. Try again." But when I screw up parenting, or say the wrong thing to someone, I am most certainly not giving myself a pass. It's for sure something I need to work on. 

A little self compassion would go a long way.

Also, I loved her quote about having your body to thank for EVERYTHING you have experienced. I think I am going to put that one up on the mirror in my bathroom to remind me to be kind to her when I see her and want to point out all her flaws. 

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And lastly,

a closing thought that I found very comforting 

as I prepare for a school year of unknowns:

"It's dark because you are trying too hard.

Lightly, child, lightly. Learn to do everything lightly.

Yes, feel lightly, even though you're feeling deeply.

Just lightly let things happen and lightly cope with them."

-Aldous Huxley

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Week 38 Around Here {2019}

Watching... Sweet Home Sextuplets and Risking It All, which are both really entertaining and I can watch with my kids (unlike The Handmaid's Tale- ha!). The boys really enjoy Risking It All, which is about families who sell everything they own to try their hand at living off the grid. 

Worrying... about Carly as she bonked her front teeth on her baby stroller, knocking them a bit loose and cutting her gums.  I was able to text a picture to her dentist's office and they assured me that she would be okay (and what to look for, just in case), which helped me relax a little bit.  But she did require cold, wet washcloths for most of the afternoon, poor girl.

Loving... our new house more everyday.  As we continue to settle in, unpacking more boxes and doing more decorating, I just love every nook and cranny more.  It's crazy to me how much it already feels like home.

Reading... Searching for Sylvie Lee on audio and The Most Fun We Ever Had.  I am loving The Most Fun We Ever Had.  It reminds me of This Is How It Always Is- every page has a small truth about what life is like with children and husbands and family... I can't get enough.
I also read Wyatt's second grade journal (finally) and loved the page he had written about being lucky.  If anything, we are lucky to have him.  That, I'm sure of.

"Vrooming"... our groceries into the house with Carly's baby stroller.  I asked for her help unloading them from the car and she asked if she could "vroom" them in.  Haha! I said yes, and it was the right answer! Sister brought in so many groceries!!!  #besthelper

Giving up... the Walmart grocery pick up.  I had been using it since late July or early August, but after multiple disappointments, and having to run to the grocery store myself anyway to get things they don't carry at Walmart, I found it just wasn't worth it.
Their produce isn't great, and their substitutions never make any sense (they didn't have sliced black olives, so they gave me green olives.  But wouldn't whole black olives make more sense? -for example).  I'm sad for the time lost to the grocery store, but it's a necessary evil.

Crying... {literally} as I drove past the emptied water park the other day and it hit me that summer is really, truly over.  I am trying to accept that fall is approaching (less than two weeks now), but I'm having a hard time.  Maybe I'll try to make a fall bucket list??? (Any ideas, friends?)

Signing... all three boys up for wrestling, which is exciting!  They've never wrestled before, but we think they'll be great, and the exercise will be really good for them. 

Laughing... at how Carly says, "Oh nothing" when I ask her what she's up to lately.  (Whenever she says that, I come a-running to see what kind of "nothing" she's up to.  Hahah!) And loving how she simply must hug & kiss all her guys goodbye everyday.  First it's Daddy, as he leaves for work; then the twins, as they leave on their bikes out the garage; then it's Wyatt, as he walks to the bus stop.  She hugs each of them, and kisses their bellies, wherever her lips hit 'em, and then runs back to her toys.
Her favorite way to end the morning is to wave goodbye to Wyatt's bus as it drives away.  So a few times a week we try to get out there to wave at it.

Taking... all three boys to the orthodontist for check ups and reprimanding Logan for cutting his wire on his own in the garage with Josh's wire cutters. Sigh. This kid.

Visiting... the vet with Ramona, who, it turns out, has a bladder infection.  We got some medication that she's been really good about taking and I'm praying she gets well quick. 

Buying... Logan a new medical bracelet (from Etsy- super cool and super cheap) after he lost his last one at the pool this summer.  I remember when I ordered his first bracelet that said "Epilepsy", it required a level of acceptance that I hadn't previously come to.  Ordering it this time was no big deal.  It's nice to be in this place with it.

Learning... how to properly breathe from Carly, who was teaching her frog how in the bath tub.  "Inhale... Outhale... Inhale... Outhale..." she said to him, over and over.  We decided that in our household we shall never say "exhale" again.  Outhale just make so much more sense.

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Week 13 Around Here {2019}

Giving... Carly the bubble maker I bought for her birthday back in January.  It has been a huge hit for all the kids and I am so happy with it! I think it's going to get a LOT of use throughout spring and into the summer.  Just watching all the bubbles float happily into the sky brings me so much joy. It's kind of ridiculous. #kidatheart

Attending... my friends' twin girls' birthday party at the local arcade.  All four kids had so much fun.  It was a great way to kill a Saturday morning & make some great memories.  They loved the prizes they got with their tickets and Carly had fun trying to play the games like her big brothers.

Having... Jack's best friend who moved away over for the afternoon Saturday.  He was able to stay for movie night and Jack was so happy to see him again.  We have all missed him, honestly.  He's one of those kids that you just love having around.  He lightens the mood, is super sweet to Carly and just really easy to be with. 

Going... to Wenatchee Sunday to see my sister and celebrate her birthday.  Carly fell asleep for some of the drive (thank you, Dramamine for Kids -before that, she would throw up. Every time.), and I took pictures, and I'm so glad I did.  They are the last pictures I got of her with her beloved favorite feather taggie, which we lost this week.  The party was really fun- we played charades, got to visit and catch up with my sister as well as my parents who were in town.

Needing... to find (and believe in) my value as a human being without tying it to what I accomplish in a day.  I have been feeling lately like I don't have value because I don't bring in a paycheck.  I have been second guessing myself in every area of my life, and really feeling down on myself.  Feeling like a failure as a wife and mother, and just questioning whether I am effective in what I do.
I put a lot of thought into it, and I think it is the stage of parenting I am in.  When you have a baby, your duties are very clear and you know if you are doing a good job because the baby is healthy & thriving. It's very cut & dry.  But I don't have a baby anymore.  I have two 10 year olds and a 7 year old.  A lot of the parenting I do is planting seeds that I won't see grow (let alone bloom) for years.  Teaching kindness and morals is much slower work than teaching ABC's and potty training.  The turnaround is less immediate. All I can do is keep working (and working, and working), praying that it's all getting in there.

Working... to combat my lack of confidence by staying in the moment with my kids, and finding that it really works.  I've been focused at bedtime on listening to each kid, giving them all my full attention, and also by making lists and accomplishing a handful of specific things each day so I feel successful.  I think some days the things we do as moms are easy to forget because each day we just have to do them over again (feed the kids, do the dishes, wash the laundry...).  Having a list to cross off makes me feel productive and confident that I am working hard & making a difference here.

Laughing... when Logan came home sick from school one day this week and couldn't play with friends after school, so he was left playing with Carly.  I knew they were going to play Nerf guns (a favorite around here), but was dying when I saw that Logan had "arrested" Carly, zip tying her hands together.  She was totally willing to play, not even irritated, just going along with his orders. Oh that girl is just the best sport! #lifewithbigbrothers

Walking... to school finally after what felt like the longest winter ever.  It was just me and Wyatt because Jack had patrol, so he and Logan rode home once his duty was over.  It is just so nice to be outside again, hearing the birds, looking up at the blue sky, and seeing some green after a winter of grey and white.

Feeling... the strong urge to spring clean as the snow melted and spring suddenly "turned on".  I did a big Goodwill run, bought some things we have been needing on my Walmart list (lightbulbs, etc.) and feel much better about the state of our house as we prepare to spend more time outside working on the yard.

Reading... No Exit and listening to Becoming on audio.  No Exit was disturbing with a ton of twists and turns. Super exciting and edge-of-your-seat. Whoooo! (Warning: it will make you want to avoid rest stops for the duration of your life. Ha!)  Becoming was equally engaging, and I found myself doing extra chores just so I could listen a little more. (It's nearly 20 hours long!)

Being... heavy hearted when Carly took her favorite taggie on a walk to the school to pick Wyatt up and we lost it.  I walked back, then drove back, then looked in the school lost & found... it's nowhere to be found. She is heartbroken.  I feel so sad for her!

Thankful... Wyatt has found some neighbor kid friends in our neighborhood.  He is so happy to go out and play after school, and I'm so happy for him to finally have friends around us.  The twins have had friends nearby since we moved in, so I'm happy for him to have the same now.

Icing... the black eye Wyatt got from a friend during a playful wrestling match.  Somehow he didn't cry when he got it, but that sucker looked painful, and only got worse as the week pressed on!  He couldn't even wear his glasses for the first two days because his face was so swollen!  Poor kiddo!

Loving... the Mother's Day gift Josh said I could order for myself (a huge splurge!) from Lisa Leonard Designs.  She had a huge sale on rings a few weeks ago, and when I saw that the rings I've had my eye on for years were on sale, I asked him if I could order my Mother's Day gift early.  He said, "Whatever makes you happy, baby," and with that, I ordered myself four sweet little rings, one with each of my kids' names on it. 
I have worn them almost everyday since, and love how they remind me that this is my greatest work, my greatest privilege.  As Ricki Lake said, "Motherhood is the greatest thing and the hardest thing." Amen.

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For a laugh:

{Do I have to answer this???}

A sweet reminder:

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