Week 43 Around Here {2019}

{November TBR}

{Catalina Magdalena Hoopensteiner Wallendiner Hogan Logan Bogan Was Her Name}

{The kid's orthodontist is so much fun! Haha!}

Making... my November reading list & feeling really excited about it. I have read twelve books so far in October, and feel confident I will hit 14 (maybe even 15) by month's end, so making my reading list for November was super fun because I feel like I will be able to get through so many good books!

• The Lies We Believe
• Things You Save In A Fire
• This Tender Land
• Nothing To See Here
• It's Not Supposed To Be This Way
• In The Woods
• Being Mortal 
• Murder At The Brightwell
• The Witches of New York

Remembering... that I wanted to tell you all I quit Monat.  It seemed to help for a while with growing my hair back (after it fell out from stress) but then it didn't seem like it was helping anymore and with the cost, I couldn't keep buying it if it wasn't FOR SURE helping. I used it for a solid nine months, and I'm glad I did, but I am equally as happy to be done sinking that kind of money into my hair every month.

Creating... our yearly Christmas cards after we got a super cute snap of our family at the pumpkin patch last week.  Shutterfly was running a 40% off coupon, and I had a free shipping code, so I ordered them and now they are done!

Reading... Tuesdays with Morrie, and The Pull of the Moon this week.  I also listened to The Aviators Wife and Gift from the Sea (one is about Anne Morrow Lindbergh, the other is written by Anne Morrow Lindbergh; both are really good!) and also The Dreamers by Karen Thompson Walker, which reminded me of Station Eleven. I couldn't stop listening. It was so good!
I've finished 75 books so far and that is just mind boggling to me. Last year I only read 68 books total. So to be at 75 books with two months left to go is really exciting! (Could I be more of a book nerd? Hah!)

Nursing... Wyatt fully back to health after a scary week last week.  The oral steroids finally started working their magic (a little slower than I would have liked) and his breathing is back to normal.  I ordered him some new nebulizer parts and I am hopeful that having a fresh mask next time he's sick will help him.  Unbeknownst to us, his old mask had a hole in the tube, so he wasn't getting his medicine as effectively as he should have been.  Old Shelly would have blamed herself endlessly for this, but New Shelly knows that life happens and all we can do is move forward.  Deep breaths.

Adulting... and getting 3 cavities filled, plus my cleaning done at the dentist, as well as getting groceries (even though I did not want to go that day) and attending our school district insurance night.  (Josh's school district is switching insurance this year, so there was a TON of information to gather. Whew!)

Hosting... our old neighbors for chili & cornbread Sunday and feeling so happy to have them over.  We are all missing each other, so it was great to get together.
That day I suffered a migraine, so I took a nap before they came over and bless Josh, he made both the chili and the cornbread from scratch.  Yum!

Cooking... tortillas with Carly's help for enchiladas on Monday.  They were delicious and turned out great and Carly had a great (read: messy) time helping. ;)
I made some chocolate chip zucchini bread this weekend & it was super yummy with my coffee each morning.
I also enjoyed some chocolate eyeballs (a Cunningham kid favorite around Halloween time) and sweet potato fries that I had with our cheeseburgers Wednesday.  I find it ridiculous how much I love sweet potato fries.

Attending... Logan's first choir concert of the year.  I was so proud of him, and it brought back so many memories of my own years of choir concerts.  The only bummer was that Carly hadn't napped that day, so sister was a handful!!!

Loving... how when Carly is coloring she always has out markers only in an array of pinks, reds & purples.
And also loving how we spent our rainy Saturday last weekend- playing Play Doh, all four kids and I, making ice cream and french fries and popsicles; growing Orbeez (those cool little beads that grow when you put them in water) and playing with them for hours; and following all of that up with pizza & cookies for move night.  The kids watched Diary of a Wimpy Kid, which is hilarious, and we all really enjoyed ourselves.

Organizing... the very last boxes in the house thanks to the help of my bestie Shana.  You know when a project is so overwhelming that you just don't even want to start? That was this project for me. So when Shana stopped by and was willing to jump in with me, I was almost weepy with gratitude.  Seriously later that evening when I was thinking of my afternoon, I teared up.  I am just so thankful for friends who know when you need a little (or a lot of) help.

Enjoying... our family dinners lately which have been filled with lots of laughter & talking.  It also brings me joy that Josh started reading his favorite book from childhood (The Giver) to the boys this week. They are loving it!!!

Dressing... Carly and her friend Kamden up as Gecko & Owlette from PJ Masks during their playdate on Friday morning.  Kara and I had so much fun visiting while these two played, and we about died of cuteness after we dressed them up.

Listening... and crying to "I Know You By Heart" by JJ Heller.  Gah, so good.  You know when a song just makes you feel heard & understood? This is that song for me.

I see you packing all the lunches
Loading all the kids into the van
Tonight you'll tuck them in at bedtime
Tomorrow you will do it all again

... You are enough
You matter in this world
Every second I am proud of who you are
Although you feel forgotten and invisible
I see you and I know you by heart

{agreed!!!}

Missing... my kids as babies & small children.  It is so surreal to me that the twins and Wyatt are eleven and eight.  Lately especially I am wistful for the mornings from before we had to wake up and get them ready and send them off to school everyday.  It's hard to find the balance between reminiscing over the past and staying here in the present.
What is helping me lately is what Kelle Hampton says to herself when she starts to feel panicky about time slipping by: "There is more."  So when I start to panic about Carly approaching her fourth birthday, or the fact that there is only a year and a half before she starts school, I take a breath and remind myself, "There is more."  More memories, more laughter, more love.  More goodness, more stories, more things to someday be nostalgic for.
On the complete opposite end of the spectrum, I also agree with what Kelle said about supporting older kids' emotional needs.  I was not prepared for this, guys, and it is a whole different level than even newborn baby twins.  haha!  Middle school might just be the death of me.

Laughing:

Josh sent me this:

{accurate. the struggle is real.}

Loving this advice:

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Week 15 Around Here {2019}

Loving... how God gives me hugs in the form of sunrises and sunsets.  This week it was the most spectacular sunrise that had our sky turning pink & purple and looking more like a watercolor and less like real life.  It was stunning, and took my breath away.

Squeezing... the last bit of fun out of Spring Break by renting Bumblebee for the kids for movie night and letting Wyatt have his friend over for pizza & cookies with us, and having my sister and her crew come over for the day Sunday.  The kids had fun together and I fell even more in love with my little niece.  She came over to me with her lovey blanket and cuddled in my lap on the couch and I seriously MELTED.  Oh how I love that little lady!

Preparing... for the week ahead by cleaning house with the kids Sunday evening and grocery shopping with Carly on Monday.

Struggling... to get back in the swing of things after Spring Break despite my preparation & good intentions.  We got out of our routine (read: had fun) over spring break and getting back on schedule (read: going to bed on time) was really hard all.week.long!  This struggle lead to some really rough mornings.  My tiredness coupled with the rain and some serious tween attitudes forced me to take some really deep breaths.  There were SO many fights to break up that one morning they found themselves grounded for the day because of their behavior.

Choosing... eye glasses for Carly who saw the eye doctor for the first time this week and is far sighted with a severe astigmatism, just like her three brothers before her.  Her prescription is not quite as strong as Logan's, which is a +5. something, but stronger than Jack's, falling at +3.5 Rx.  She looks ridiculously cute in her glasses.  I can't wait for them to get in with her lenses ready.
They had to dilate her eyes pretty severely so her pupils were huge for two whole days, and I joked that if she had asked for a unicorn I'd have gone out looking for one. Thankfully I had found a pair of tiny pink sunglasses on sale at Walmart earlier this week.  She put them to good use those two days.
Even though all three of our boys have bad vision, I don't think I had prepared myself for the idea that she would need glasses.  I was a bit in denial that we produce children with bad vision, I guess.  Luckily she's excited to match the brothers and I think she'll be adorable in them.
We also chose new glasses for Logan & Jack after their annual eye appointments this week.  I am so grateful for our awesome local eye doctor's office- the doctor and everyone on his staff is so great.  They fix the boys' glasses when they break, help us choose good glasses that tend to come with the best warrantees (because they know they will be seeing us soon with broken glasses in hand) and are so kind & engaged with my kids.

Reading... The Life You Longed For, which was slow to start, but then really good (& interesting- about Munchausen by proxy, so creepy!) and also Queenie, which I still haven't gotten totally into.  Meh.
I also listened to the rest of My Year of Rest and Relaxation, which was bizarre, but totally entertaining, and Lousiana's Way Home, which is a middle-grade read by Kate DiCamillo and is a sweet, short read.
Receiving my Book of the Month order, containing three books I can't wait to read!  This month I ordered Normal People by Sally Rooney, Miracle Creek by Angie Kim and Lost and Wanted by Nell Freudenberger.  If I can't get myself into Queenie, I may just jump into one of these next!

Thankful... that when Wyatt gets sick it doesn't produce in me the same anxiety that it used to.  We know so much more now, and we have the right mix of meds to keep him out of the hospital and off of oral steroids, both of which feel like miracles.  Every time he gets sick, I never cease to be grateful that the nebulizer does what it's supposed to (we use albuterol & budesonide in it 2x daily when he's sick) and it keeps us from having to be seen and keeps him from getting worse.  Hearing him cough doesn't send me off into a panic like it used to.  I never imagined that could happen.  What a blessing.

Smiling... about my new haircut.  It's been six months since I started Monat, and about eight months since most of my hair fell out, following a really stressful period of parenting Wyatt through a bout of bad asthma and Logan through a period of severe seizures that were uncontrolled by medication. I am taking some strong vitamins as well as biotin, plus using Monat shampoo (Black & Renew) and conditioner (Revitalize) everyday as well as their Replenish hair mask weekly, Rejuvenique hair oil twice a month, and Intense Repair Treatment & Rejuvabeads Split End Mender daily.  At first it felt like a lot, but my girl Haverlee assured me that in the end it would all be worth it. And thus far, she's been right.
I've been keeping it shorter since it started falling out, and this most recent haircut has me actually feeling like it's getting better.  I am so excited!  It's so true that you don't know what you got till it's gone.  I totally took my "good" hair for granted.  I actually envy Carly's messy bun. Hah!  But hopefully not for long.

Rolling... right into baseball season with practice every day of the week for either the twins or Wyatt's team.  It's crazy, but it's also kind of our favorite.  Plus it has meant Uncle Samuel is around more because he is helping Josh coach the twins' team, and that is everyone's favorite.  He makes us smile more and laugh harder.  Carly is especially in love with him.  He always says yes to reading a story or a playing a game with her, and it makes her so happy.  It's the most precious little relationship, watching her light up when he gets here.

Confirming... with our amazing orthodontist that Wyatt does need a spacer for his tiny little palate/nasal area.  It turns out he has a deviated septum, which makes it very hard to be a nose breather, which is what everyone should be.  If we can put a spacer in his mouth, spreading his palate a little wider, it will also give his nose a little more "room to breathe" (pun intended) and will allow him to breathe through his nose despite his deviated septum.

Impressed... by Carly's ability to draw things.  A few weeks ago she started drawing faces, and now her faces have legs and arms and sometimes hair.  Then earlier this week she drew a whale.  She's only three and I'm kind of blown away by her talent.

Momming... so hard this week.  You guys.  Sometimes I think that maybe we shouldn't be the ones who decide how many kids we have.  Like, when I had Carly, parenting the other three was relatively easy.  But now? Now that hormones are involved? Oh sweet baby Jesus, hold me.
I am parenting so hard that most days I can barely get into my pajamas at bedtime.  I forget things, I am constantly running late, I resolve to be patient, lose my temper, resolve to be patient again.  Lose my temper. Again. Sigh.
We are working with the kids on problem solving with our words instead of our bodies (there is seriously so.much.fighting with three brothers born within three years); teaching how to wash our bodies completely in the shower now that none of the boys are bathed by mom or dad; and how to choose the right friends to hang around. (Why is being "cool" so cool?)
They never stop moving, never sleep, never shut up.  (For reals. Is there even that much to talk about? There can't be. And yet.) They wake me up at least twice a night for nightmares, anxiety or imaginary ailments.  I am always so flipping tired.
But also, being with them, hearing their thoughts at bedtime as I tuck them in, rubbing their backs as I sing them a song from JJ Heller's lullaby album, it's like my church.  They are my devil and my redeemer.  They are my savior and what I need rescuing from.  Children's books read out loud in their beds, piled high with blankets & stuffed animals, followed by hugs, kisses and snuggles? That's my church.  I wouldn't trade it for anything.  But some weeks, I'll tell you, I am putting in the WORK. And this was one of those weeks.

And since... laughter is good medicine, here's something funny I read this week about mom sleep.  "It's like regular sleep, but without the sleep." 
It's funny cause it's true.
#dying

Heartwarmed... when I went to plug in the twins' cell phones and found they both had Carly's picture as their lock screens.  They may fight with each other, and drive me CRAZY, but they are amazing big brothers, and they love her like nothing in this world.  She's so lucky to have them.

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Next week, I am going to try to get on top of my self care.

• 1) Go to bed on time
• 2) Wake up before the kids
• 3) Working out in some fashion everyday
• 4) Take time to read 
• 5)  Journal something each night

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